ARE YOU WEARING DENIM SHORTS?
Are you wearing denim shorts?
They are cheeky by all reports
The Denim certainly comes up short
You must get some bawdy retorts
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 349
Little Miss Muffet
Sat on a tuffet ,
Eating of curds and whey;
And if you ever wondered
What a tuffet is
You’ll find them on Ebay
DILF IS AN ACRONYM
DILF is an acronym for
“Dad I’d like to ****”
I got one that says
“Who’s the daddy”, just my luck
THE IRISH CELEBRATE ST PATRICKS DAY
The Irish celebrate St Patricks Day
And I have always wondered why
As they have three patron saints
Perhaps Patrick had a better PR guy
HE WAS NOT BLESSED WITH LOOKS
He was not blessed with looks
And had a look to be pitied
He had a face like a fit, but
You couldn’t tell what it fitted
HIS FEATURES WERE AT ODDS
His features were at odds
Individually each was a quirk
His face didn’t seem to understand
The value of teamwork
NEGLECTED WIFE
She was a good wife but was neglected
She had no marital attention paid
Her husband was always in the pub
Blowing the froth off another barmaid
ALTHOUGH I’M CLEARLY NOT A GIRL
Although I’m clearly not a girl I do
Understand the concept of a trainer bra
But if there are similar aims with trainer socks
Then I don’t know what they are
MY NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOUR IS FAT AND BALD
My next door neighbour is fat and bald
And just sits around all day
He’s looks like the Buddha, but without
The enlightenment I’d say
THE DEFINITION OF OXYMORON
The definition of oxymoron
Well that should be a breeze
I’ll give you a clue, it’s not
A person too stupid to breathe
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