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Thread: A Little Bit Of Humour # 139

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    Registered User Biggus's Avatar
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    A Little Bit Of Humour # 139

    ARE YOU WEARING BRAZILIANS?

    Are you wearing Brazilians?
    It’s very bold of you to mention
    Oh they’re some kind of knickers
    I clearly wasn’t paying attention
    I must admit my mind wandered
    When I heard you say Brazilian

    21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 341

    Ding, dong, bell,
    Pussy’s in the well.
    Who put it in?
    I did, because
    It’s the neighbourhood bully

    ARE YOU WEARING AN EASTER TOP?

    Are you wearing an Easter Top?
    Well I very much like what I see
    Because there isn’t very much of it
    And the contents are bursting free

    DURING THE EASTER HOLIDAY

    During the Easter holiday
    From coast to coast
    What do you call a stuffed animal?
    We call it a turkey roast

    THE BEST EASTER ACTOR OF ALL TIME # 2

    The best Easter actor of all time
    Is something of an acting Ophelia
    And there can only be one winner
    And that would be Bunnie Bedelia

    WHEN YOU ARE IN A LONG TERM RELATIONSHIP

    When you are in a long term relationship
    On Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries
    Your normally rational other halves
    Turn into fire breathing adversaries
    And those once happy and joyous occasions
    Become life and death quests to test us
    To see if we can find the perfect present
    And that goes double for Christmas

    I DON’T LIKE STRIPPERS

    I don’t like strippers
    Pouting erotically
    Bumping and grinding
    Doesn’t do it for me
    Nor Pole dancers
    Going at it athletically
    Lap dancing likewise
    Doesn’t do it for me
    Watching women undress
    That does do it for me
    Providing of course
    I can find a suitable tree

    I’VE BEEN INVITED TO GO AND SEE

    I’ve been invited to go and see
    Pole dancing and I’m rather keen
    The last time I was only ten
    And it was on the village green

    MY DAD JOINED THE NAVY

    My Dad joined the Navy
    To see the world
    And get out and about
    But once he’d seen it
    He wasn’t impressed
    And wanted to get out

    HOORAY HENRYS AND HENRIETTA’S

    Hooray Henrys and Henrietta’s
    Don’t act like our social better’s
    The so called cream of society
    Can’t even achieve regular sobriety

    Flaunting their wealth and partying
    They’re behaviour makes me sick
    And they’re only really the cream
    Because they are all rich and thick

  2. #2
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    I liked the one defining "stuffed animal" the best.

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