21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 366
Five little speckled frogs
Sat on a great big log
But they were soon to become
A delicious entre yum, yum
MY GRANDDAD WON’T EAT BROWN BREAD
My granddad won’t eat brown bread
Because he doesn’t have to anymore
When he was a boy his whole family
Had to eat it because they were poor
WHEN POLICE SEARCHED THE HOME
When Police searched the home
Of Cliff Richard, and were to seize
A very large amount of material
Because they were led to believe
There was a link to Yew Tree
And they found among the amalgam
To their complete and utter disgust
That he was releasing a new album
BATSMEN WEAR A PROTECTIVE BOX
Batsmen wear a protective box
In order to ensure
That the bowler cannot
Rearrange his furniture
ESKIMO FISHERMEN
Eskimo fishermen sat shivering in their kayak
So they lit a fire in the craft to warm the two
And it immediately sank, proving once and for all
That you can't have your kayak and heat it too
EIGHT OUT OF TEN INNER CITY MALES
Eight out of ten inner city males
Have had sex in the shower, they admit
However the other twenty percent
It would seem haven't been to prison yet
BUSINESS CONVENTIONS ARE IMPORTANT
Business conventions are important
They demonstrate without a doubt
Exactly how many employees that
A company can operate without
WHENEVER WE ARGUE
Whenever we argue
You cry without fail
Has no one ever told you
Crying is blackmail
YOU HAVE THIRTY PAIRS
You have thirty pairs
Of shoes, more or less
And standing in the room
In obvious distress
Won’t make me choose
No matter how much you press
The appropriate pair
To go with that dress
ARE YOU WEARING A DENIM SKIRT?
Are you wearing a denim skirt?
Whether it’s in fashion or not
If you don’t mind me being bold
You manage to make it look hot