THINK ABOUT GLOBAL WARNING
Think about global warning
When you look at your cake
Lighting all those candles
Would be a very big mistake
MILESTONE 60 # 4
I don’t want you to think that today
I think of you as a little older
I wouldn’t think that on your birthday
Actually I think of you as a lot older
WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE
When we have to go somewhere,
Then absolutely anything, to be fair
Is honestly fine for you wear
I WENT TO A POSH JEWELLER
I went to a posh jeweller to buy a new watch,
And I told the geezer I wanted it really top notch
So he said “Analogue” I replied “No, just a watch"
AN UNSUSPECTING PENSIONER
An unsuspecting pensioner
Was approached by a professional begger
"Lady, I haven't eaten in three days."
"Force yourself dear," she says
ONE POTATO TWO POTATO
Roast potato
New potato
Boiled potato
Sure
Mashed potato
Waffled potato
Baked potato
More
Wedges with dips
Hash browns and Chips
You should eat your fill
Of the Dublin mixed grill
IN THE NINETIES WE ALL LOVED TO DANCE
In the nineties we all loved to dance along to
Billy Ray Cyrus and his “Achy Breaky Heart”
Now I’m approaching my seventies I've got
Achy, breaky everything and I’m falling apart
THE YOUNG BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE
The young beautiful people
Think they are acts of nature,
But the beautiful old people
Know they’re works of art for sure
I WOULD NEVER HAVE KNOWN YOU WERE THIRTY
I would never have known you were thirty
You're not at all like a thirty year old
You are very youthful in many ways
But the giveaway, if I may be bold
Was not your youthful appearance at all
Your taste in music was your downfall
THE EVOLUTION OF MAN
From good boy
To a nice kid
A promising start
Then from a great guy
To a fine man
And finally an old fart