Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: Problems With The Emmys’ Red Carpet---A Satiric Essay

  1. #1
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Orange County, CA
    Posts
    41

    Problems With The Emmys’ Red Carpet---A Satiric Essay

    Not a short story, but short nonetheless. Thought I'd take a break from fiction and delve into the perilous recesses of personal opinion...

    Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed the Emmys this week. On a day of being miserably couch-ridden due to the ever-so-interrupting cold, they were a welcomed distraction from nose-trumpeting and hippo-hacking. The pre-show ceremonies, however, did not palliate my condition. I know, I know. I could’ve changed the channel. But realizing that millions—if not the majority—of Americans were watching the jaunt of gaudily-clad theatricals down the blood-red carpet, I could not but help use this display as fodder for a critical lens.

    “Who are you wearing?” Dolled-up interviewers love to ask this ubiquitous question to arriving actors. But is it necessary? Superfluous, I say. As if we need to know how many already-wealthy fashion designers they keep throwing money at. Sure it’s good for the economy—a niche economy more than likely catering to the have-mores. Fashion is big, I get it. Yet we get enough of it in the endless commercials played between the ceremony itself, let alone the ads during the dreaded empty-your-pockets, holiday-hegemony celebration.

    Secondly, E!’s or NBC’s gym-rat/ stiletto-wobbler hosts need to extend their interviewing skills to non-actors. Are actors talented? Yes. Do they work harder than others in TV series production? That, I’m not so sure. What about the often unrecognized voices of directors, producers, writers, film editors, graphic artists, sound engineers, music arrangers? Actors seize spotlights every time. Let’s give the lesser-paid talents, who put in longer hours, their time to shine and be heard. After all, America likes merit—Rosie the Riveter had merit.

    Hey, and why not have a pre-show section on those running the Emmys? You know, the people who roll out the red carpet, spruce the place up, and show the “exalted” to their seats. Behind-the-scenes perspectives stimulate and entertain. Awards set designers, parking attendants, photographers, janitors—these worthies would drip ceremony anecdotes from their mouths like melted molasses.

    Set designers spotted McConaughey scoping out the place hours before start time. Valets witnessed Julia Roberts and Kristin Wiig arguing over a parking spot. (Well, their limo escorts, really. The actresses chitchatted during the discord.) A bathroom cleaner confessed Seinfeld truly is a germ-a-phobe, after a recently-filled soap dispenser was practically empty when the comedian left the facility. All I’m saying is why can’t we document everyday people running the award show that tends to award TV shows that do just that—dramatize the average persons—albeit in a more scripted, fictional manner?
    Last edited by Igor, Froderick; 08-29-2014 at 01:11 PM.

  2. #2
    Inexplicably Undiscovered
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    next door to the lady in the vinegar bottle
    Posts
    5,043
    Blog Entries
    72
    “What are you wearing?”
    Actually, the oft-asked question is: "Who are you wearing?" meaning, one presumes, the designer of the frock.

  3. #3
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Orange County, CA
    Posts
    41
    Right you are. Editing now. Thanks for reading!

  4. #4
    Registered User DATo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Posts
    387
    Well, what can I say Froderick? America has a penchant for idolizing the inane and irrelevant while ignoring the urgent and consequential.

    I do not watch awards shows. Is it not enough that these people make enormous salaries and are treated like royalty in their day-to-day lives? Must they also congregate to stroke each other's egos like a bunch of dissatisfied, strutting peacocks?

    I also do not attend testimonials ... even when given for me. A person knows their own worth and does not need to be reminded of it, nor should they be affected by adverse opinion if their conscience is clear and they have fought their best fight.

    As I am writing this I am convinced beyond doubt that propped against a haystack somewhere in rural America, or sitting on some American curb with his or her entire estate within arm's reach is a better actor, singer, politician, scientist or healer than those who are routinely lauded with trophies, garlands, medals and other symbols of distinguished achievement. But for the whims and dictates of Providence, the injustice of nepotism, and the circumstances into which they were born the world has never heard of them. How many Abraham Lincolns, Albert Einsteins, Mother Teresas, or William Shakespeares throughout the story of mankind were never known to the history of the race while martinets possessing no talent or ability of any kind - whose only right to eminence was the bloodline they were born into - stood in rule over their betters. How many millions of lives have been destroyed by such people while people of true merit have, through the fickle machinations of Fate or the evil of man been denied their destiny - a destiny which might have benefited us all.

    But let us continue to bow before the golden calves of entertainment we have erected as our gods. Idols, to be worshipped and emulated throughout their lives, and upon their deaths to be dismissed, forgotten and replaced by future symbols of the inane and irrelevant.

  5. #5
    Artist and Bibliophile stlukesguild's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    The USA... or thereabouts
    Posts
    6,076
    Blog Entries
    78
    I don't know that America has a greater penchant for idolizing the inane and irrelevant than any other culture.











































    A quick perusal of Art History proves that the past was just as enamored of inconsequential celebrity: athletes, spoiled heirs of the very wealthy, women known only for their beauty and who they were sleeping with (whether as courtesan, mistress, prostitute, or wife), actors and actresses, singers, bankers and other businessmen, fashion designers and fashionable dressers, failed rulers and failed writers, etc...
    Beware of the man with just one book. -Ovid
    The man who doesn't read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them.- Mark Twain
    My Blog: Of Delicious Recoil
    http://stlukesguild.tumblr.com/

  6. #6
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Orange County, CA
    Posts
    41
    You both make good points about the history of the masses' fetish with celebrity. Personally, I think we're seeing a slow progress of popular depiction of everyday citizens--it's happening, but much slower. Someday perhaps the hidden geniuses and altruists will have their own rightful place within popular appraisal.

  7. #7
    I'm enjoying this conversation
    Last edited by feelab; 10-25-2016 at 05:56 AM.

  8. #8
    Registered User Steven Hunley's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    San Diego Calif.
    Posts
    1,739
    Blog Entries
    15
    Kind of discouraging isn't it? Always measuring our narrow pathetic lives against the width of the silver screen. But we're Americans. That's what we do.

    Loved this short piece.

Similar Threads

  1. A Carpet Of Bluebells
    By ShadowsCool in forum Personal Poetry
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 02-09-2012, 12:05 PM
  2. magic carpet
    By MystyrMystyry in forum Personal Poetry
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 09-18-2011, 07:29 PM
  3. The Satiric Effect of Battle of the Books
    By Dipen Guha in forum The Battle of the Books and Other Short Pieces
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 11-01-2010, 04:09 AM
  4. Carpet Grazing
    By MissTwain in forum Personal Poetry
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 05-22-2009, 08:34 AM
  5. Essay Problems
    By The page master in forum Antony and Cleopatra
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 10-09-2005, 11:54 AM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •