ARE YOU WEARING GLITTER EYE LASHES?
Are you wearing glitter eye lashes?
It’s a very interesting look
Not enough people make themselves
Appear ridiculous in my book
21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 328
Sing a song of sixpence
A pocket full of rye
Its two and a half p now
But that doesn’t rhyme
SMOKING ISN’T BAD FOR YOU
Smoking isn’t bad for you
Not in my personal view
And what I based that on
Was that it cured my bacon
CUSTOMER SATISFACTION
I was so unhappy
With the service
At my local café
I wrote an insult
On the table
In tomato ketchup
Before leaving
Which is what I call
Complaining with Relish
YOU HAVE A REALLY DELICIOUS FIGURE
You have a really delicious figure
Oh I so love it when you wiggle
As you parade with vim and vigour
And you make your goodies jiggle
IF YOU’RE CONSIDERING A TATT
If you’re considering a Tatt
I suggest you think about that
Realise what it is you’re looking at
And let me tip you the wink
Just pause if you’re on the brink
And think before you ink
AN EARLY SIGN OF SUMMER
An early sign of Summer
But make no mistake
One swallow does not
A stag night make
DO YOU LIKE PICNICS?
Do you like picnics?
There’s one on Sunday
If you say yes
It could be a funday
But let me say
Before we begin
Bring a blanket and be
Prepared to sin
SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DAY WEEK
On Monday Snow White feels Sneezy
On Tuesday she’s feeling grumpy
By Wednesday she feels Dopey
And On Thursday she’s feeling Bashful
On Friday Snow White feels Happy
And On Saturday she feels Sleepy
But on Sunday when she wants a rest
Then Doc gets inside her vest
ARE YOU WEARING A CHEST WIG?
Are you wearing a chest wig?
Did you get it off a yeti?
He must be cold without it
But it does suit you Betty
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