[I]Hey all,
your comments and opinions would be really good. I'm trying to see what people think of my stories. I know there might be a few grammatical mistakes so I would appreciate only comments about how to best improve the actual storyline and what emotions were stirred while reading it.
thanks for reading/I]
As I came into the room, shutting the front door behind me, I heard a soft cry come from the couch. I walked around to see who it came from and why. She was there, Holly, rolled into a ball with a blanket over her. Her face streaked from tears. Her eyes glittered heartbreakingly. My heart ached for her. Every time I saw her like this my chest constricted and my brain put up its walls. I went and pulled her up into my arms.
“I’m going to be alone forever, aren’t I?” she asked between hiccups of tears. My hand supported the back of her head as she rested it on my shoulder. I lay my cheek against her.
“No” I replied.
“Then why am I? Alone and forgotten?” she asked “how is it, that out of all the people in the universe, I can’t find just one person to love me?” I didn’t answer. I loved her. The problem was I couldn’t say the words. I dreamt of her and ached for her but I couldn’t help her. No matter how hard I tried the words wouldn’t fall from my lips. The beaten and broken child inside me wouldn’t speak up. I didn’t want to turn out as an abusive husband and I didn’t want to hurt my children.
She’s better off with someone else then me, I thought. She was worth the world and if I couldn’t give her that I would find someone for her who could.
“I’ll help you find someone” I said to her “I promise”
7 years later
“Thank you all for coming to my wedding” Holly said smiling at the crowd that had gathered. 5 years ago I had introduced her to a man call Jason Sphynk. I had met him through a work colleague and trying to fulfil my promise to Holly I gave her his number. 5 years after that day I stood as her best friend, and unfortunately her maid of honour. I could never have said I love you to her, even though I still felt it, but I gave her the next best thing; someone to make her smile.
“I would love to say a special thanks to Shane. Without him, my beautiful maid of honour” she joked and I smiled just by looking at her smile. “I wouldn’t have met my beautiful husband, or found this gorgeous gown” again the crowd laughed. As she did a twirl I watched the light catch glimmers of her raven black hair that fell in curls. I saw her brown eyes light up and gleam with happiness. I saw a smile that had never been directed to me, just my words. I took a drink of wine before looking back at her. The beautiful bride I would never have. I needed air, to clear my mind. As holly restarted her speech I looked at the crowd. My sister was sitting in the back of the room. She was one of Holly’s not so close friends. She gave me her knowing look. The look she gave me when she thought I made a mistake and that I should have fixed it.
But I did fix it, I thought, I saved her from a misery that would soon come. I saved her from myself.
Once the speeches were through I watched the love of my life spin her heart out on the dance floor. I watched her laugh and joke and sing. Then I went home alone. My bed cold and empty; just like my heart.
50 years later
Holly was dying. In the hospital hooked onto machines to measure her heart rate. Her husband, Jason, had died 5 years ago from a stroke. Holly’s two sons, daughter in laws and grandchildren were gone and I decided to visit. I couldn’t let her die alone.
“Hey Holly bear” I said sitting slowly down in the visitors chair. My voice cracking and old, I supported my hand on my walking stick. We had gotten older but our thoughts were still young.
“Hey my beautiful brides maid” she said back, smiling softly through the wrinkles on her face. Those wrinkles represented so many things. Happiness and sadness. I remembered when she had her first child. She announced me god father and I had never been so happy. I was still single and running around like a child at that point in my life. I made sure I did everything right for that child, even if he wasn’t mine. I remembered the birthdays and Christmas’s. I also remembered my lonely life.
“How are you doing?” I asked, grabbing her swollen and old hand in mine. She tried to smile again but it turned into a fit of coughing. The nurse came in and rearranged her on her pillows.
“Fine” she said finally. “Just holding on to my last threads” I could see that too. Her fight was nearly over. A tear leaked out my eye. I couldn’t stop it. it was hard enough to live a life with this woman, never mind without.
“I need to know one thing before I go, Shane” still holding her hand, I bent my head down and kissed it.
“anything” I said and in that moment I meant it. in the next, I wasn’t so sure.
“Why did you never have your own family?”
“because I didn’t need one”
“why?” she asked. I knew what she was thinking. I had heard my sister, before she passed away, told Holly about my love affair with her. Holly’s eyes now pleaded that it wasn’t true. A tear leaked out of her eyes as she realised, after all these years, that it was true.
“All I needed was you” I said “and I couldn’t hurt you so I let you go”
The heart monitor started beeping faster and her hand loosened on mine.
“I love you” but the light had already been taken from her eyes. Tears ran wildly down my face, and I left the room as soon as possible. I couldn’t see my best friend, the love I never had, leave this world. I still never told her that I loved her, not while she could still care. I just let her know it was her and before I died, I had to come to terms with that.
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Originally Posted by thewriter9813
