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Thread: The Uncertainty of Time

  1. #1
    All are at the crossroads qimissung's Avatar
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    The Uncertainty of Time

    How many hours until I see you again?
    Til we can lie and look into each other’s eyes
    And I can see the black ring that
    Surrounds the green of them?
    The hours are counting down
    And I can feel the nerves
    Hovering under my skin
    Like nervous goldfish
    I want to be beautiful for you
    And I want candlelight
    And your hand in mine
    And a certain romeo-like intensity
    But then again, maybe I will
    Just be happy that you have
    Knocked on my door again
    That you are at my table
    And in my presence again
    And that as we eat this mostly
    unmemorable meal I can gaze into your eyes
    and see the black ring that
    Surrounds the green of them again.

    Qimissung
    February 14, 2014
    "The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its' own reason for existing." ~ Albert Einstein
    "Remember, no matter where you go, there you are." Buckaroo Bonzai
    "Some people say I done alright for a girl." Melanie Safka

  2. #2
    Snowqueen Snowqueen's Avatar
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    Really nice poem Qimi I enjoyed reading it. I feel there is a touch of innocent love in these lines.

  3. #3
    Registered User
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    Beautiful outcome, qimi! Like Miss Snowqueen stated above, it has the punch of innocence

  4. #4
    Justifiably inexcusable DocHeart's Avatar
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    I should have written this for my intended on Thursday and presented it to her last night. With a Valentine's present like this, MAN I would be in for a treat at bed time...

    Nevertheless, I would have changed

    The hours are counting down
    And I can feel the nerves
    Hovering under my skin
    Like nervous goldfish


    to

    Hours counting down;
    The nerves
    Hover under my skin
    Like nervous goldfish


    since the pace picks up here and becomes more staccato, and I don't want the "I can" part to slow it down -- and "The nerves" on its own line would make me extra breathless.

    I've missed reading this forum the way I used to. Poems like this serve as a strong reminder.

    Regards,
    DH
    Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine...

  5. #5
    Registered User 108 fountains's Avatar
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    A very sweet Valentine Day poem. What makes it so good is the sincerity that the reader can feel.
    A just conception of life is too large a thing to grasp during the short interval of passing through it.
    Thomas Hardy

  6. #6
    Registered User tailor STATELY's Avatar
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    Enjoyed this poem from 2014!

    Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
    tailor STATELY
    tailor

    who am I but a stitch in time
    what if I were to bare my soul
    would you see me origami

    7-8-2015

  7. #7
    Registered User NikolaiI's Avatar
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    "Time is a playful guest" I wrote in one poem. I do not have the rest memorized.

  8. #8
    Registered User NikolaiI's Avatar
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    Qimissung, if you think they are Romeo, RUN. ❤

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