ARE YOU WEARING A ONESIE? # 2

Are you wearing a onesie?
I didn’t know you were the type
But you have surprised me
And yes I like the tiger stripe

It’s rather a shapeless thing
Am I being picky and choosy?
To be honest I don’t like it
But I’d like to see your twosie

I’M THINKING ABOUT TAKING A HOLIDAY # 5

I’m thinking about taking a holiday
But I don’t know where to go
What if I end up in Capable
I find that that’s often where I go

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 297

Kind hearts are gardens,
Kind thoughts are roots,
Kind words are blossoms,
Kind deeds are fruits.
But none of this rubbish
Gets the bloody grass cut

THE RED HOUSE

I met her in the Red House
When she gave me the eye
I gave her an appraising look
And thought I’d give her a try
I knew my luck was in when
She was unbuttoning my fly

ANNA WAS A GOOD TIME GIRL

Anna was a good time girl
In fact she really had a ball
And we called her Anna Glypta
As she liked it up against the wall

MY DOG MUST BE MUSICAL

My dog must be musical
What rubbish I hear you groan
But he must be I tell you
As I saw him eating a trombone

RED EYE

In all the photos of her
She was terribly Red Eyed
I thought it was the camera
But no matter how I tried
I couldn’t get a good shot
But it wasn’t a lack of skill
Or any technical fault
It turned out she was evil

I’M WORRIED ABOUT ONE OF MY HENS

I’m worried about one of my hens
There’s something wrong with Megs
I think she must have been possessed
As she keeps laying Devilled eggs