ARE YOU WEARING A STRAPLESS BRA?
Are you wearing a strapless bra?
With tits the size of yours
You’d have done better
Tucking then into your drawers
WALT DISNEY ON ICE
The kids wanted to see
Walt Disney on ice
They all thought
It would be really nice
However it turned out
To be some old geezer,
Walt Disney apparently,
Lying dead in a freezer
OUR FAMILY PLANNING
There are only 13 months
Between my two little chaps
It was actually by design
As we didn’t want a big gap
So thats why as part of the plan
My wife had a Caesarean
THE DALAI LAMA
In a vote for a leader of our planet
The Dalai Lama would be my bet
I would certainly risk a grand
If I were a Tibetan man
FOR MY 60TH BIRTHDAY
For my 60th birthday
I bought myself a sports car
It’s my pride and joy
Not that’s it’s been very far
As there is a slight problem
An oversight I have to admit
I need a hip replacement
Before I can get in it
THE BANK OF MUM AND DAD
When I bought my house
My parents kindly helped me
And now I really can’t
Thank them enough - apparently
ARE YOU WEARING A FASCINATOR?
Are you wearing a fascinator?
Well tell be more about that
Oh my imagination was all agog
But now you tell me its just a silly hat
ROUGED CHEEKS
Rouged cheeks
And blood red lips
Varnished nails
And tattooed flesh
Dyed sculptured hair
And black shadowed brow
Who are you?
All pierced and painted
And what have you done
With my lovely daughter?