As the little train rumbled ever closer to the vortex known as Kansas, things were getting exponentially stranger. It was as though time were a piece of wax, falling on a termite, who’s choking on the splinters. Kirk smirked when he noticed Admiral Decker was wearing beefcake pantyhose, and Ismael’s voice came over the P.A. saying, “I’m a driver, I’m a winner. Things are gonna change. I can just feel it.” Ripper was contemplating what to do with a guitar string and Scotty looked at Ismael and said, “Careful, laddie, don’t believe everything that you breathe. You’ll get a parking violation and a maggot on your sleeve.” So he killed the headlights and put in neutral. The Count needed butane in his veins and Ahab shaved his face with some mace in the dark. The hippies were getting crazy with the Cheeze Whiz while Watson and Holmes were watching rerun shows and the daytime crap. Iron Mike stuck his head in the room and said, “You know what I’m sayin’?”
Q, proving himself to be a fickle Q, laughed maniacally and reached with two fingers for the lever on the Cosmic Commode, and then…
Bilbo Baggins smacked the side of the set and said, “Goddammit! Aerial’s out again.”
*My sincerest apologies to Beck. http://youtu.be/6DnD9RBdkfE
**Sorry about punting it back to you, Pen, I needed to get to work, and I wasn’t quite sure where to go next anyway.