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Thread: friendship of the sexes

  1. #1
    confidentially pleased cacian's Avatar
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    Red face friendship of the sexes

    Is there such a thing as a true friends men to women without the added sexual connotations?
    In other words can a woman/man be friends with each other without feeling there is more to it then that?
    Last edited by cacian; 01-04-2013 at 03:37 PM.
    it may never try
    but when it does it sigh
    it is just that
    good
    it fly

  2. #2
    Caddy smells like trees caddy_caddy's Avatar
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    oh, Men are the best friends to women .Women gossip too much and keep a secret just untill reaching the first neighbor's door

  3. #3
    confidentially pleased cacian's Avatar
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    Haha and then what happens when she reaches the first neighbor's door caddy?
    it may never try
    but when it does it sigh
    it is just that
    good
    it fly

  4. #4
    Caddy smells like trees caddy_caddy's Avatar
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    Oh!The whole village will know about your secret in the following day. I never dare to tell a woman anything whenever I need to speak to someone. I prefer to speak to myself aloud then do it. Forgive me ladies , but that is based on my personal experience.
    Last edited by caddy_caddy; 01-04-2013 at 03:59 PM.

  5. #5
    confidentially pleased cacian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by caddy_caddy View Post
    Oh!The whole village will know about your secret in the following day. I've never dare to tell a woman anything whenever I need to speak to someone. I prefer to speak to myself aloud then do it. Forgive me ladies , but that is based on my personal experience.
    So according to you women are loud and men are secretive?
    it may never try
    but when it does it sigh
    it is just that
    good
    it fly

  6. #6
    Caddy smells like trees caddy_caddy's Avatar
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    Yeh , and I think a man feels proud if a woman trusts him and tells him her secrets ; that's maybe why he tries to be trustworthy.

  7. #7
    Dance Magic Dance OrphanPip's Avatar
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    Yes men and women can be friends.
    "If the national mental illness of the United States is megalomania, that of Canada is paranoid schizophrenia."
    - Margaret Atwood

  8. #8
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    Until technology enables us to download the thoughts of men and women through an app on our phones, of course we can be friends!
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  9. #9
    Registered User Calidore's Avatar
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    My best friend of more than 25 years is a woman, and we've never fooled around.
    You must be the change you wish to see in the world. -- Mahatma Gandhi

  10. #10
    Suzerain of Cost&Caution SleepyWitch's Avatar
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    Yes.
    10chars

    On a more serious note, is this a philosophical question or are you asking for advice?

  11. #11
    confidentially pleased cacian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SleepyWitch View Post
    Yes.
    10chars

    On a more serious note, is this a philosophical question or are you asking for advice?
    Hi SleepyWitch. Firstly can I ask what is 10chars?
    And this is a philosophical question. I hear somewhere else women and men cannot be friends truly and so I needed to check.
    I personally had many men friends without any problems but it can be tricky for others I hear.
    it may never try
    but when it does it sigh
    it is just that
    good
    it fly

  12. #12
    confidentially pleased cacian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Calidore View Post
    My best friend of more than 25 years is a woman, and we've never fooled around.
    That is impressive.
    it may never try
    but when it does it sigh
    it is just that
    good
    it fly

  13. #13
    Some of my greatest ever friendships have been with the opposite sex.

    It's entirely possible to value the bond you have as friends over wanting to get laid.
    Vladimir: (sententious.) To every man his little cross. (He sighs.) Till he dies. (Afterthought.) And is forgotten.

  14. #14
    confidentially pleased cacian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pierre Menard View Post
    Some of my greatest ever friendships have been with the opposite sex.

    It's entirely possible to value the bond you have as friends over wanting to get laid.
    I entirely agree with you. I think the more friendship between the sexes the more value we put to sex.
    it may never try
    but when it does it sigh
    it is just that
    good
    it fly

  15. #15
    Suzerain of Cost&Caution SleepyWitch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cacian View Post
    Hi SleepyWitch. Firstly can I ask what is 10chars?
    And this is a philosophical question. I hear somewhere else women and men cannot be friends truly and so I needed to check.
    I personally had many men friends without any problems but it can be tricky for others I hear.
    10chars is when your original message is too short and the forums says you have to have at least 10 characters and you type "10 chars" to meet that requirement. (I only wrote "Yes." first, which was too short. But then I decided to add more anyway but left the "10chars" there.)

    Anyway, it depends on the individuals. I read in a book about mixed-sex friendships that it works for those people who think it can work and it doesn't work for those who think it can't.

    The thing is that you need very firm boundaries (both for the other person and your own behaviour) and that's not easy for everyone because they might not know what they are looking for (friend or romantic partner) or they want to be "nice" and are afraid of having firm boundaries because they don't want to be cruel.

    It also depends on how you handle sexual tension. E.g. two of my guy friends might initially have had a crush on me, but they didn't tell me or "pester" me in any way. (One of them is married and the other got a girlfriend a little while after he got to know me and is married ot her now). So I just pretended I didn't notice and gave them time to get over it. After all, it's only natural (not because I'm amazingly attractive, but I mean there's nothing wrong with crushes). They did get over it.
    One of them doesn't keep in touch with me anymore because he's lazy, so I can't be bothered with him. But the other is one of my closest friends and I think our friendship is all the deeper because I tolerated his initial confusion and decided to work on our friendship anyway and because he didn't make a fuss like some guys will.

    But I've also had a guy friend who claimed he wants to have female friends but then he was always trying to hug me when I didn't want to hug him and he turned out to be a crazy stalker, so I got rid of him.

    I've also got a male acquaintance (not really a friend) and there is a lot of sexual tension between us (we're both married), but that just developed over time because we clicked on an intellectual level and neither of us says anything flirty to the other. Would I meet up with him on my own in a dark corner at midnight? No. But why would we? But should I stop talking to him and be cold and distant when he hasn't wronged me in any way? No.
    Adults can be aware of these things and deal with them without even discussing it with each other. The more you expose yourself to mixed-sex situations, the better you can handle them.
    So, I'm not saying that there will never be sexual tensions, but it all depends on how you deal with it.

    But then, I've had guy friends since I was in primary school and I was brought up that way. Many people get brought up to socialize only with the same sex and to only see the other sex as potential romantic partners. Such people will not be able to handle same-sex friendships and it's easy to see why.
    Last edited by SleepyWitch; 01-06-2013 at 07:55 AM.

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