Prose…
Poetry…
Poetic prose…
Nonsense.
I write
As a newborn cries
As a newly opened
Wound bleeds.
But I write. I write
Not to die from this death
That kills us all every day
A little more…
I write to die-to die
of another death!
Prose?
Poetry?
Poetic prose?
Nonsense!
He noblest lives and noblest dies
who makes and keeps his self-made laws
Richard Francis Burton
Jeos - it serves a purpose, then. Therefore it isn't nonsense, is it. But what kind of death do you expect to die from? Your verse here reads to me more as a cry for fulfilment in life...
My two pence (for what they're worth):
Prose, poetry, poetic prose…
I write,
like a newborn cries,
a fresh wound bleeds.
I write,
not to die from a death
that kills slowly every day,
but from another -
prose, poetry, poetic prose…
tell me!
Ah ! My friend...of course it serves a purpose ! when I "say" poetry, prose etc, I am referring to the academic dispute around gender (such a thing still exists believe me...)
'a cry for fulfilment in life...': you just have to add the word "spiritual" between 'for' and 'fulfilment'and you will be absolutely right...as I do not believe in any other kind of fulfilment and I am a very picky one...;-) - I hope this last comment will clarify your question on 'death.' too...
Next week it will be my vacations turn - at the isle of Madeira...I hope that the dantesque landscape will inspire me!
He noblest lives and noblest dies
who makes and keeps his self-made laws
Richard Francis Burton
Of course, "spiritual" was implied, for life IS. Specifying would have sounded as if I don't trust it.
Get the best of your well deserved rest in Madeira (dream island, I even wrote about in my "Julio"!).
Last edited by Bar22do; 08-24-2012 at 06:14 AM.
As a work of satire this has the halmark of genius. If you are possibly referring to the recent furore around an appointment at a prestigeous British university where an academic, female in this case, was prepared to stab a male colleague in the back in order to secure the position, then the references to death and gender politics in academia would make quite a lot of sense.
I'm not entirely convinced that this was your intention though. It's a little florrid in style for my taste and might benefit from some judicious pruning. A little less 'flouncing,' perhaps...
Live and be well - H
Last edited by Hawkman; 08-24-2012 at 05:59 PM.
Hawkman what do you mean exactly by 'flouncing'? For in portuguese that gives something like "crazily kicking" :-) ...
To get now & then the comments that counts from people that counts it's all that I need.
Thanks for the other "tubes" too.
He noblest lives and noblest dies
who makes and keeps his self-made laws
Richard Francis Burton
I'm not quite sure how to explain flouncing... Not so much crazily kicking, more sort of melodramatic with a touch of high camp, I think is about as close as I can get to it. A bit theatrically exaggerated. Sorry, you lost me with the "tubes" thing, but you're welcome anyway
Live and be well - H
Your capabilities in a language that is not your first are remarkable. This poem's posture is not to this reader's taste, but there's no denying there's something well done about it.
For a real freak of nature, you should read some of Bar's stuff. She's not a native English speaker but good god she may be the best of us (and certainly is, at times).
J
Am touched, thogh of course your enthusiasm regarding my modest endeavours is highly exaggerated.... Thanks a lot, Jack.Originally Posted by Jack of Hearts
P.S. and the accent should remain strong on "at times"!
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