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Thread: Fifty Shades O'Grady

  1. #1
    riding a cosmic vortex MystyrMystyry's Avatar
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    Fifty Shades O'Grady

    Fifty Shades O'Grady
    Has sunglasses to spare
    To keep his eyes shady
    Out of the sunny glare

    He has a purple set
    Some orange ones
    But some have met
    Sitting Doom Buns

    These are his cheeks
    Which beneath them
    His sunglass breaks
    Made useless by bum

    It's happened often
    Always makes him mad
    Pillows tried to soften
    But too late, now sad

    He tries to put them
    In his shirt instead
    Even sewed a hem
    For when not on head

    If he remembers this
    But habits die hard
    Usually he is remiss
    They snap into shards

    As a last ditch he chose
    To knit a woollen vest
    Placed them into rows
    Can't get them off his chest

    He wore them all at once
    Did Fifty Shades O'Grady
    Many think he's a dunce
    But with Fifty Grades of Shady






    .
    Last edited by MystyrMystyry; 08-12-2012 at 09:03 PM.

  2. #2
    The 5&1/2 Minute Hallway The Truth's Avatar
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    Got to admit, I saw the title and can admire the wordplay in that alone, but this whole poem retains the atmosphere the title gives off and it's a great one.
    “Why did god create a dual universe?
    So he might say
    ‘Be not like me. I am alone.'
    And it might be heard.”

    ― Mark Z. Danielewski, House of Leaves

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    riding a cosmic vortex MystyrMystyry's Avatar
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    Thankyou The Truth

    Yes, I believe it is always a wise - if unscrupuolous - move to attempt capitalising on others' commercial success

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    Absinthe minded bIGwIRE's Avatar
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    I couldn't have read this at a better time because my wife just sat on her D+G glasses. "Sitting doom buns " made me lol. I hope you don't mind if I borrow that line for real life?

    For grievous war these arms don't ask,
    No armor, save this joyous flask

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    Inexplicably Undiscovered
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    Another cute one from you, this time about a guy who keeps breaking his sunglasses, mainly because he doesn't know which "end" is up.

    The pun in the title is clever as well, but I hope that your little verse lasts longer in (ahem) "posterity" rather than the lurid novels that inspired your title.

    I used to visit a certain poetry workshop site that had many rules, one of which was prohibiting the word "shard." This of course referred to the emotionally overwrought laments amateur poets tend to post, not to the actual meaning of the word -- broken glass!

    One crit: the rhymes fall flat in a couple of places. Your rhythm as well
    could benefit from the Archie Bell and the Drells treatment.

  6. #6
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    Ha Ha. Good one MM and I liked the line sitting doom buns too!
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  7. #7
    riding a cosmic vortex MystyrMystyry's Avatar
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    Thanks Bigwire

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    riding a cosmic vortex MystyrMystyry's Avatar
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    Thankyou Aunty

    I agree it should outlive its inspiration because in comparison it's, well, let's face it - brilliant!

    Now there has been a lot of fingerwagging about this aspect, and I am well aware of my rhythmic gymnastics - but I can't help it: I'm Jazz! I feel the spaces between the beats

    (And I can't be asked to notate with ridiculous stress marks like in my edition of G.M. Hopkins, especially on here where indents and spacin' go missin' - so there! )

    Shard is one of those words that in itself sounds incomplete - like it's a broken off piece of 'brokenshard' (to me). My complaint with it is that when I hear or see it I get to thinking about how incomplete it sounds*



    *I have the same problem with Cuba Gooding Junior for some reason. I'm certain his name should be Cuba Shoulding Woulding Coulding Gooding Junior. It just never sounds right otherwise.

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    riding a cosmic vortex MystyrMystyry's Avatar
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    Thankyou Delta


    Thankyou Delta


    Thankyou Delta

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    Inexplicably Undiscovered
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    Quote Originally Posted by MystyrMystyry View Post
    *I have the same problem with Cuba Gooding Junior for some reason. I'm certain his name should be Cuba Shoulding Woulding Coulding Gooding Junior. It just never sounds right otherwise.
    I'm pretty sure it is Archie Bell and the Drells. Not the other way around. The operative word was the title of their song.

    I'm not a big fan of a comic we have over here stateside whose stage name is Larry, the Cable Guy, but I do like one of his jokes in which he said that he missed a gig because he was confused about the venue: he could figure out if it was Hank Williams, Jr. High School or Hank Williams Junior High School.

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    riding a cosmic vortex MystyrMystyry's Avatar
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    I got that it was in the title Aunty (interesting if it was the first recorded funk track ever: I'll be looking into that further - I'm always sceptical of first and biggest and fastest claims, though there's no reason to doubt this one

    Today I had a Baader-Meinhof cross deja vu moment, multiple actually, all linked, and I started to write a poem about the experience, but it's going to take some time to get right - just warning you

  12. #12
    Beyond the world aliengirl's Avatar
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    Nice pun in the title and you didn't let down the expectation I had from the poem. "Sitting Doom Buns" is great. Ha,ha,ha!
    I must create a system, or be enslaved by another man's. ~ William Blake

    Captivity is consciousness,
    So's liberty. ~ Emily Dickinson

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    riding a cosmic vortex MystyrMystyry's Avatar
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    Thankyou Alien Girl!

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    riding a cosmic vortex MystyrMystyry's Avatar
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    Timely to bump this?

    (Curiously in searching google for it I just discovered someone had borrowed the title for a book, available on Amazon, which I haven't read)

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