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Thread: A melody between the two worlds

  1. #1
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    Arrow A melody between the two worlds

    When he becomes old
    He will still pray for you
    In the sunset
    he is merely
    an unnoticeable grass blade

    In the moonlight and starlight
    who would enjoy the dance of the fireflies?
    No one but the pulse of the soul
    chanting a melody
    a melody between the two worlds

    Last edited by lh33334; 03-06-2012 at 06:33 AM.

  2. #2
    Registered User tailor STATELY's Avatar
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    Loved this poem.

    When he becomes old
    He will still pray for you
    In the sunset
    he is merely
    an unnoticeable grass blade

    In the moonlight and starlight
    who would enjoy the dance of the fireflies?
    No one but the pulse of the soul
    chanting a melody
    a melody between the two worlds
    Small quibble: is the word "the" necessary in the last line ?

    Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
    tailor STATELY
    tailor

    who am I but a stitch in time
    what if I were to bare my soul
    would you see me origami

    7-8-2015

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by tailor STATELY View Post
    Loved this poem.

    Small quibble: is the word "the" necessary in the last line ?

    Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
    tailor STATELY
    I am glad that you enjoyed the poem.

    As for the definite article "the" in "between the two worlds", you really pointed out something interesting. I hesitated whether to use it when I was writing the last line. At last, I decided to use it since the poem as a whole is implying something between this world and the hereafter. So when I came to the last line, my thinking was still focused on the two worlds ( this world and the hereafter)---the two worlds "implied" in the previous lines even though the word of "world" was not presented.

    But I think, if it is dropped, it won't affect the meaning too much.

    Reader maybe have better understanding on the usage of "the" , I am open to correction, please share your opinions.
    Thanks again for your reading.

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