Post your tips for a happy life. No more than one tip per post and put them in bold please, thanks.
Tip 1 - Never refuse a drink
If someone offers to buy you a drink always say yes. By all means return the favour, but never say no if someone offers you a beer.
Tip 2: If you have to get dressed in the dark, check everything's on the right way around in the light.
I didn't ....
Tip 3: When getting a pretty girl drunk, keep exact tabs on how much she drinks
...No matter how pretty the girl is, getting rid of the puke staines and smell in your car the morning after is never worth it.
Tip 4: Try everything once except incest and Morris Dancing.
"L'art de la statistique est de tirer des conclusions erronèes a partir de chiffres exacts." Napoléon Bonaparte.
"Je crois que beaucoup de gens sont dans cet état d’esprit: au fond, ils ne sentent pas concernés par l’Histoire. Mais pourtant, de temps à autre, l’Histoire pose sa main sur eux." Michel Houellebecq.
Tip 5: Zip up slowly or you might not be in a position to give tips.
I do...now...
Brilliant tips. I knew that I was on to a good thing when the idea for this thread popped into my head while I was washing my hair.
Tip 6 - Wash your hair regularly.
It keeps you clean and smelling nice and you get good ideas.
Tip 7: When towelling, rub in Winter and pat in summer. The first creates a warmth through friction, the second cools with circulating air.
It took me 44 years six months and 2 days to realise the truth of this.
Tip 8 - Buy a bike (but avoid double suspension mountain bikes as they are hardly ever needed and slow on the road).
Keeps you fit, cheap & economical, enjoyable - sense of freedom, cuts down on the need to use public transport, green.
Tip 9: Do as others would do unto you - only do it first.
"L'art de la statistique est de tirer des conclusions erronèes a partir de chiffres exacts." Napoléon Bonaparte.
"Je crois que beaucoup de gens sont dans cet état d’esprit: au fond, ils ne sentent pas concernés par l’Histoire. Mais pourtant, de temps à autre, l’Histoire pose sa main sur eux." Michel Houellebecq.
Tip 10: Never judge a man till you walk a mile in his shoes. That way, you'll be a mile away AND you'll have his shoes
Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb
Tip 11 (or so): Smell the roses and avoid the pricks.
Last edited by tailor STATELY; 08-29-2011 at 07:27 PM. Reason: bold
tailor
who am I but a stitch in time
what if I were to bare my soul
would you see me origami
7-8-2015
Tip 12 - Forgive your enemies.
Nothing annoys them as much...
(Oscar Wilde)
You sir have just changed my life !Originally Posted by Paulclem
Seriously never thought of that, and it makes so much sense too
Tip 13 - If God had meant us to fly he would have given us tickets
Haha, it's a cruel twist of fate that I've had the worst, most vile hangover of my life for the last two days. This is the first five minutes that I've been able to stand up let alone look at a glowing computer screen, and I clicked on this thread thinking "come on, Neely, make me feel better." Now I look like this:
Last edited by JuniperWoolf; 08-29-2011 at 08:43 PM.
__________________
"Personal note: When I was a little kid my mother told me not to stare into the sun. So once when I was six, I did. At first the brightness was overwhelming, but I had seen that before. I kept looking, forcing myself not to blink, and then the brightness began to dissolve. My pupils shrunk to pinholes and everything came into focus and for a moment I understood. The doctors didn't know if my eyes would ever heal."
-Pi
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