I'm 17. I'm a kid. I write Slam poetry, am trying to write a sequence of sonnets in hopes of publishing, experiment with free verse, almost have a girlfriend, love frisbee, play it everyday and practice my trombone once a week. I log onto this website looking for truth: about literature, philosophy, life, love, experience, whatever ethereal substance lies beyond the confines of my vocabulary and the even larger confine of the English language.
Every day my life is different, very literally. My music intonation changes. I write different poetry, and lines I write the day before are forgotten, sound vastly different or just don't seem like poetry. The weather changes in correlation to my mood. Everyday my girlfriend looks different; sometimes beautiful, sometimes not, sometimes amazing, sometimes shocked that she came to school wearing the same clothes as she did the night before, indicating she may have slept in them. But the eyes I look at her with are always the same.
There are a lot of constants to my changing life. My eyes for my girlfriend are the same, as are my tastes. My love of poetry and nervousness when writing, inertia when attempting to motivate myself to write, and dreams for publishing burning brightly. I read everyday, text my girlfriend, still have two parents, always love frisbee and seafood and get a total kick out of big band jazz.
I get it. I'm a kid. I'm still naive to the "Real world" and to all metaphysical experience parents have that adolescents inherently don't. But the world around us is changing, globally and locally, almost with every second, both scientifically and metaphysically. Given the opportunity to relive any day of my life at random ten times, I'd probably experience that same day ten different ways, always feeling different sensations.
Finding truth amongst a changing world isn't easy. How do I know it's even there? How do I know my rationalizations create a false pretense, ascribing a truth when nothing may exist? How do I know there is a beautiful system within the physical system that binds us to scientific, moral and emotional law? How will I know if I find it? And is it subjective? Is my truth any different from your truth?
Is there a truth at all?