An interview with JuniperWoolf:
*Are you sure you want to do this?*
Totally, I’ve been jealously watching other people’s interviews from the sidelines for one year and eleven months. Serves me right for joining a month after my birthday.
*Who killed Roger Rabbit?*
It’s been pointed out in previous interviews that Roger Rabbit is alive and well.
*Whose footprints would you find in the fridge?*
Someone very small.
*So, how old are you?*
Twenty three.
*If you had a personal theme song what would it be?*
I had to think for a while, but settled on:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ghkl8Ohx4Z0
*Are you male or female? *
Female.
*Do you like red cars?*
I have no opinion on red cars.
*What makes you keep coming back to the Forum?*
It’s my internet home.
*Are you happy with the way things are here?*
Yes.
*If you could change one thing about the LitNet, what would that be?*
I’d get rid of a few people who take the “fun” out of “fundamentalism.”
*What was the inspiration for your LitNet username?*
Juniper is my favourite word and Woolf is the name of my study hall at the U of A.
*Which countries have you visited?*
Just Canada and America.
*Which languages do you speak?*
English and terrible quality French.
*How do you like your home town?*
It’s beautiful and nosy, and if you run out of money because your house burns down or something equally tragic a lot of people randomly give cash to the general store to give to you (Linnea got almost $200,000 when her family died). Also, if you want to go up town for groceries or something you have to walk part way up a mountain. It’s strange. I usually like it, especially the woods.
*If you could live somewhere different, where would it be and why?*
California, because it’s California.
*Do you have any pets?*
I have a lot of animals in my house right now: one snowy owl, two Canadian geese (a lesser on the deck and a greater in the back yard), a frog from Ontario that isn’t supposed to be here, six dozen mice give or take (for the owl), an ugly little catfish which lives on my dresser, a large mastiff, a stupid noisy house bird and an exotic spider that also isn’t supposed to be here (don’t tell Fish and Wildlife).
*What makes you happy?*
Food, things that are pretty and people who are genuinely funny.
*Do you feel comfortable in your walk with God/atheism? *
I’d be kind of wary of anyone who says that they are.
*Which actor should play you in a movie based on your life?*
Emily Perkins.
Who is your favourite Beatle?
John (I know, I‘m such an individual).
*How do you like your coffee? *
With lots of unhealthy vanilla flavoured cream and fru fru additions that don‘t add to the taste at all (like cream in the shape of a flower and heart-shaped candies on the rim of the cup).
*Given the option, what animal would you choose to be?*
Sea turtle. They live for a long time, they’re hard to kill and they go everywhere.
*What's the biggest fish you've ever caught?*
I caught a big wall-eye at Slave Lake. I didn’t weigh it, but it almost pulled me in.
*What makes you feel great about yourself?*
Pfft, what doesn‘t?
*How did you meet your significant other?*
The gentleman who is currently courting me taught me in high school (scandal!).
*Who inspires you most?*
Alan Moore.
*What are you naturally good at? (Skills, abilities, gifts etc.)*
I have a pretty insane ability to pay attention. It doesn’t sound like much, but I can study for eleven hours a day.
*What is the one thing you must do before you die?*
I’m guessing tuck, duck and roll.
*If you had to teach something, what would you teach?*
Hmm… one of those government orchestrated “self esteem” classes where kids get to just talk about themselves.
*What would you regret not fully doing, being or having in your life?*
Well I don’t know
yet.
*If you were to be stuck at a particular time in your life, which one would you choose and why?*
Well I’d get pretty bored, but if I
had to, my final year of high school. That was a good year.
*Do you have a tasty recipe for life that you could share for a reasonable price? … Is it REALLY tasty?*
See, I’m not sure if this question is asking about food or if it’s some kind of life metaphor. In either case, I just throw together random things that I enjoy.
*What method do you cherish above all others, as means to improving your life?*
It’s a tie between reading and talking to people.
*If you were a king/queen for a day, what would you do?*
Kill everyone.
….No, I’m just kidding. If I were queen of Canada, I guess I would be a powerless figurehead living in England with my face on everyone’s money. I’d drink tea and wave at people.
*What’s the stupidest forum argument you’ve ever had?*
Hmm, there are a lot (A LOT). I guess it would be that time I digitally overreacted at Bien about whether or not children should be made aware of the existence of homosexuals.
*What song is in your head at the moment?*
Nothing, I’m watching South Park.
*Which book are you reading at the moment?*
The Golden Bough.
*What is your favourite quote?*
Catch the witness, catch the wit, catch the spirit, catch the spit!
*Favorite avatar on the Forum?*
Basil’s girl-and-book.
*Favorite threads?*
I like “Rate That Song” a lot. I’ve listened to almost every song in that thread more than once.
What's your favorite sandwich?
I like cheeseburgers. That’s a sandwich, right?
*What is your answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything?*
“I don’t know.”
*What are you wearing at the moment?*
Blue pyjama bottoms, a white tank top and an army green zipper hoodie.
*Favorite poem?*
Rimbaud’s
Ophelia, but I’ve got to give a shout-out to
To His Coy Mistress.
*First novel you remember reading on your own?*
I think it was some Goosebumps book.
*What era do you find most of the books you read are from?*
1910 - 1960ish.
*Favorite TV shows?*
My personality is basically a combination of Northern Exposure, South Park and Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
*Which Forum members would you like to meet in person?*
Well, I’m destined to marry Basil, so I
guess I should meet him (at least once). I’d be good friends with Pip and Becca irl. I’d be pretty shy to meet The Comedian so I think I’d hide in his class. .
*Last words you said out loud?*
I read out loud, so the last words I said out loud were “the last words I said out loud were.”
*Last person you hugged/kissed?*
Some Dave guy.
*What do you do (for a living) to be able to keep your LitNet addiction going? And are you happy with your chosen profession?*
I do student stuff. The government and various companies/family members give me money, and I work underpaid jobs until I leave without notice.
*Would you rather be an educated fool or an ignorant fool?*
An ignorant one. Educated fools are always so anxious. Ignorant fools are at least sure of themselves.
*What would you like to be if you could change your profession?*
I always really wanted to be a brick layer (not even kidding).
*Which one of the seven dwarves are you and why?*
Sneezy, I’ve got a lot of allergies (grass, cats, trees, ect.)
*What is your most outstanding feature?*
I’m told that I have a “smart mouth” (by jerks, mostly). Also, I have hot pink hair. Stands out.
*If you could change one thing about the way you look, what would that be?*
I’m too small. I’d like to be a bit stronger.
*Which book do you wish you had written?*
The Twilight series, because I would be hella rich (that’s right, I just said “hella”).
*What book would you recommend to others of all types and ages as a must read?*
I’m not going to say
The Grapes of Wrath, because a lot of people seem to find it boring. I’m going to say
Lost Girls, because the ensuing chaos would be hilarious.
*What should you be doing at the moment instead of answering these questions?*
It’s 11:37 pm, so nothing.
*Describe your ideal day, please.*
I once got to ride a tank around a field, I’d like very much to do that again. I want to get into a good fight with Travis Harder (he was my best sparring partner ever, great offence and terrible defence just like me but now he‘s a stupid missionary in Africa or some crap). I also want a t-bone steak for dinner, with hollandaise sauce and crab meat on it (and I’d have a nice, artery-clogging poutine for lunch).
*Favorite movie?*
Pi.
*Last movie you watched?
Hmm… haha, oh yeah - Back to the Future was on The Space Network last night.
*How are you going to pick just one favourite painting?*
Easily. I don’t like most paintings.
*Favorite painting?*
Landscape with the fall of Icarus.
See his little legs in the bottom right?
Bowie, yay or nay?
Yay, especially in Labyrinth because, I mean, [I]come on]/I].
*Wonderful Superman or depressing Batman?*
I’m more of a villain type. I love Lex Luthor.
*Something you want to forget but you never can?*
Last year I decided to study serial killers, and I kind of wish that I hadn’t (especially Jeffrey Dahmer, I couldn’t eat steak for a
long time after reading about him).
If you could relive one moment in your life whenever you wanted to, what would it be?
Going to Disney Land when I was nine, as long as I could do so with the perspective of a nine year old. I was pretty pumped.
What is the best thing that happened to you since your last birthday?
I saw a cougar. A lot of people living here go their whole lives without seeing one, they’re as rare as tigers are in Russia. It ran right across the road, it was fantastic.
*If you could send one thing to the Room 101, one would that be?*
When you get a really nice meal prepared, something that you know you’re really going to love like roasted meat with lots of gravy and bread, and then you drop it on the floor or your stupid dog jumps up on the counter and eats it or something. God, that sucks. That really, really sucks. Then you have to eat
*Tell us something scandalous about yourself.*
This isn’t my natural hair color.
*How long did it take you to answer all of these questions?*
Over an hour, and I skipped some.
*One final word of wisdom for LitNet users?*
This survey will fulfill your need to talk about yourself for
at least the next year. It took up eight pages on my word document.