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Thread: Aiteology of a Lady Bug

  1. #1
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    Jul 2010



    As per Manta's message, I would be greatful if you could delete this poem.

    Many thanks

    Last edited by Asphara; 07-30-2010 at 10:46 AM.

  2. #2
    The Skinny Lad adityasam's Avatar
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    Jul 2010
    You have a very different style of writing and I liked it to some extent. It's so modern.

    Something is happening to me, oh god, NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    These things are not suitable for poetry. Had I been in your case, I would have kept it simple.

    I specially liked the years part. On the whole, it was a good one.

  3. #3
    Registered User tailor STATELY's Avatar
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    May 2009
    Gold Country
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    I liked the word 'Aiteology', and the title "Aiteology of a Lady Bug".

    After that I was lost.

    Excellent !

    who am I but a stitch in time
    what if I were to bare my soul
    would you see me origami


  4. #4
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    Apr 2010
    This is a very potent piece of writing - the sounds you create from your choice of words, in particular their repetition, is astounding.

    BUT it is difficult to grap what the underlying theme is.... perhaps that was your intention.

    I had an inkling that the 1st poem might be something to do with a 'beauty spot' - although the final verse seems to suggest something more like corruption.
    The 2nd is very disturbing - possibly madness or metamorphosis.
    The 3rd might refer to the 'lady bug' character in the arcade game - complete with sound effects
    As for the final poem,I give up.

    Thought-provoking all the same, and original if nothing else.

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