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Thread: Litnet's version of Devil's dictionary

  1. #3031
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Jawbreaker: Now this one's tricky. On the one hand, it's the proper name of an ubiquitous candy treat. On the other--well, the other's more or less the same, but usually applied to girls of a certain age sashaying down the halls of our secondary schools in improbably tight skirts, with their books under one arm, while with the opposite hand they twirl lollipops in their mouths.
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  2. #3032
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    You didn't provide another word, Tyrion. OK, let's say it is "lollipop".

    Lollipop: Something cute girls twirl in their mouths as they sashay down the hall to their next class to help them gain weight.

    Sashay:

  3. #3033
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Sashay: A deliberately provocative style of walking employed by said girls in aforementioned tight skirts to cause a certain reaction in the male teachers such that they have to excuse themselves to the men's room, where they can be found weeping and punching their fists against the tiles.

    Tease: Which kind of tease is up to you.
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  4. #3034
    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
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    Tease: The way a woman with cavernous visible cleavage daintily pulls her skirt down after crossing her legs upon sitting down.

    Cavernous:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  5. #3035
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Cavernous: I once dated a girl who was cavernous. Mind you, her previous boyfriend was a power forward.

    Anaconda:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  6. #3036
    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
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    Anaconda: The world's largest, but not longest, snake from the Amazon, which isn't Facebook postings notwithstanding, in Africa..

    Facebook:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  7. #3037
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Facebook: Most significant invention since the heretics fork, the difference being, of course, the pleasure given by the heretics fork.

    Surreptitious:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  8. #3038
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    Surreptitious: Jawbreaker word for "sneaky"

    Aficionado:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  9. #3039
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    Aficionado: A fan or fanatic absorbed by the thought of something or other that normal people couldn’t care less about.

    Literally: (Like in the following: "She chased me here. She chased me there. To escape I had to literally jump into a parallel universe.")

  10. #3040
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Literally: Not figuratively or metaphorically, but actually, as described, as in "I literally just ate a whole pizza, and am now wishing I'd only done it metaphorically. Tomorrow I'll be sitting on the toilet for literally hours."

    Regularity:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  11. #3041
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    Regularity: A pattern detected in repetitive events that happen over and over and over again to the point that one expects them to continue happening over and over and over again.

    Parallel Universe:

  12. #3042
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    Parallel Universe: Donald Trump's residence

    Trump:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  13. #3043
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    Trump: A card or suit of cards that has a special role to play in a game. It could also refer to a politician and if you are reading this in 2116 rather than 2016 you hopefully have never heard of him.

    Suit of cards:

  14. #3044
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    Suit of cards: Sort of like "The Emperor's New Clothes" 2) heart, club, diamond, spade or if it's a deck of Tarot Cards swords, staves, cups, and pentacles. I have also heard that the card suit known as "clubs" was once "acorns"

    Tarot Cards:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  15. #3045
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Tarot Cards: In every city, town, village, burgh, hamlet or hillock in America, there's a hole in the wall store front with a tacky neon sign advertising the fortune telling prowess of Madam Zora, who, for reasons far beyond me, continues in this day and age to be able separate the witless from their money, as they shuffle in like lemmings to have their futures revealed via the tarot cards. Did someone say a fool and his money are soon parted? I think someone did.

    I Ching:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

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