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Thread: Litnet's version of Devil's dictionary

  1. #2266
    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
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    Hobnob: To bootlick your way into a social gathering beyond your station by ingratiating your self with false praise and insincere hero worship

    Lazy:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  2. #2267
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    Lazy: A life skill that obsessive compulsive people didn’t learn.

    Skill:

  3. #2268
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Skill: A flat-bottomed pan used for frying, searing or browning. Sorry, that's skillet. Skill: Something you spend years developing in hopes of impressing a girl, only to find out she prefers other girls.

    Pointless:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  4. #2269
    The Poetic Warrior Dark Muse's Avatar
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    Pointless: A spear without a pointed head otherwise known as a staff.

    Mundane:

    Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before. ~ Edgar Allan Poe

  5. #2270
    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
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    Mundane: Fancy word for "common", "plain", etc. used when one feels pompous in one's oratory: Ex: Preacher: "The Word of God does not adhere to the mundane facets of earthly mortification!" Say What?

    Macabre:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  6. #2271
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    Macabre: Something normal folk think goes best with words like grim, ghastly, gruesome and gross.

    Gross:

  7. #2272
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    Gross: 1) a dozen dozen 2) One who eats a dozen dozen at one time

    Obese:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  8. #2273
    Registered User mona amon's Avatar
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    Obese: What happens when one eats a dozen dozen dozens of times.

    Cheese
    Exit, pursued by a bear.

  9. #2274
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    In lieu of a dozen dozen--donuts, that is, the nice ones with jam on the inside and fine powdered sugar on top--a penchant for the fermented curd will make one obese.

    Ferment:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  10. #2275
    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
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    Ferment: A chemical reaction that transforms grapes into wine, hops into beer, curd into cheese, and fools into politicians

    Chemical:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  11. #2276
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    Chemical: An atom or molecule the theory of chemistry focuses on to make predictions such as hydrogen, oxygen and chemical X.

    Upscale resale:

  12. #2277
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    Upscale resale: To purchase an expensive item second hand

    Jump to conclusions: The ease with which an irrational answer is given when something unexplained happens!

    unexplained:
    Last edited by Pendragon; 09-06-2015 at 10:03 PM.
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  13. #2278
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    Unexplained: Something that doesn’t fit easily into current theories and so has to be monkeyed with to protect the current theories from being overthrown.

    Overthrown:

  14. #2279
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    Overthrown: Now considered unlikely in light of recent discoveries or because it obviously doesn't answer the current question

    Question:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  15. #2280
    The Poetic Warrior Dark Muse's Avatar
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    Question: What?

    Answer:

    Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before. ~ Edgar Allan Poe

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