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Thread: Your ship has sailed

  1. #1
    Such is life I suppose N.W.Alexander's Avatar
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    Your ship has sailed

    Since my youth I have been
    led astray
    nurtured from synthetic truth
    from my very first day

    Taught to see the world
    through binoculars
    so I would miss whats right in front of my
    face

    "no, no, no child that's
    just an excuse" they
    explain

    as they sit and stare
    at dancing molecules
    performing aimlessly in
    the air

    subconsciously the mask
    of majority they all so easily
    wear

    asking questions
    about everything except
    the truth such a taboo,
    they wouldn't dare

    for they would be forced
    to find themselves
    the small part they
    hid away and
    didn't share

    and once there
    they can only stare

    deep and hard

    trembling
    knowing that the door to their soul has
    been unbarred

    their mortal reputation eternally scarred

    mind aching
    while there desperate
    eyes search out
    a piece of themselves that
    has yet to be charred

    but its to late the ship
    has long been at
    sea
    its destination is permanent
    and by now there is no
    way for me to
    rescue thee
    Last edited by N.W.Alexander; 04-18-2010 at 09:22 PM.
    Some books leave us free and some books make us free.
    -Ralph Waldo Emerson

  2. #2
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    I see this poem as a little revolt against rationality, what, in the world of reason, is called “reality”. Casual rhymes, seem to be really casual - appear, occur on their own, showing the leadership of unconsciousness and its intention to grid at the “real”, formed at the field of consciousness. I like it.

  3. #3
    Original Poster Buh4Bee's Avatar
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    I've read both your poems and you seem to write from a very raw place; I like that level of honesty .
    Last edited by Buh4Bee; 04-19-2010 at 10:17 AM.

  4. #4
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    I like this and it communicates its message very well, showing how we build walls around ourselves and construct an image of our own persona which we project to conceal our darkest secrets. thanks.

  5. #5
    Such is life I suppose N.W.Alexander's Avatar
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    Thank you
    Some books leave us free and some books make us free.
    -Ralph Waldo Emerson

  6. #6
    Still, on a chalk plateau Bar22do's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by N.W.Alexander View Post
    Since my youth I have been
    led astray
    nurtured from synthetic truth
    from my very first day

    Taught to see the world
    through binoculars
    so I would miss whats right in front of my
    face

    "no, no, no child that's
    just an excuse" they
    explain

    as they sit and stare
    at dancing molecules
    performing aimlessly in
    the air

    subconsciously the mask
    of majority they all so easily
    wear

    asking questions
    about everything except
    the truth such a taboo,
    they wouldn't dare

    for they would be forced
    to find themselves
    the small part they
    hid away and
    didn't share

    and once there
    they can only stare

    deep and hard

    trembling
    knowing that the door to their soul has
    been unbarred

    their mortal reputation eternally scarred

    mind aching
    while there desperate
    eyes search out
    a piece of themselves that
    has yet to be charred

    but its to late the ship
    has long been at
    sea
    its destination is permanent
    and by now there is no
    way for me to
    rescue thee
    We tend to forget our inmost riches.... ah.
    I love your poem very much, its spontaneous tone, its verses' freedom, it's really well written (just pls see little typos)...
    I disagree with your conclusion though, if I may, for I so strongly believe - pls forgive me - that
    "there is always way for me to rescue thee"!
    A new day is a new life offered, and however difficult it seems to un-bury whatever is really us, it's possible and even not so hard once we set ourselves to do it, to manifest our own (retrieved) will power beyond what has "shaped" us while trampling on our essence... IMO.
    Thanks for your good poem, and warm regards to you - Bar

  7. #7
    Such is life I suppose N.W.Alexander's Avatar
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    wow thank you, Please feel free to say whatever strikes you upon reading my poems whether pro or con. I appreciate it all, having said that I do agree with you on an idealistic level of thinking. For hope is sunshine to the soul. Also I apologize for the typos but I don't see them if you could point them out ? Thanks
    - Nick
    Some books leave us free and some books make us free.
    -Ralph Waldo Emerson

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