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Thread: one last call for angels wing

  1. #1
    Wolf Revolte's Avatar
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    one last call for angels wing

    One last call, for angels wing
    To walk this earth, to walk with me
    To tread these bricks, of sand and stone
    Whilst rivers sing, sweet songs of hope

    One last call, for angels wing
    To fill thine soul, to fill thine breach
    To slay these cares, for bread and drink
    Whilst rivers floods, float love to speech

    One last call, for angels wing
    To cure this wound, to cure this dream
    To kill thine ache, in heart and mind
    Whilst rivers flow, brings hope in lite

  2. #2
    Registered User paperleaves's Avatar
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    Wow, this is ethereal and liquid, a dynamic expression of being lost and found, a yearning in a petite prayer. I love it, thanks for sharing!



    love
    paper
    "real
    loneliness
    is not
    necessarily
    limited to
    when
    you are
    alone
    "
    -C. Bukowski

  3. #3
    chercheur ~Sophia~'s Avatar
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    While I'm not a huge fan of using archaic words like "thine" this poem has wonderful visuals. I especially love the first two lines. One little suggestion - I think you have a typo in the 8th line. It should be "Whilst rivers flood". Nice job!

  4. #4
    King of Dreams MorpheusSandman's Avatar
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    I thoroughly agree with paper; this is a minor gem of a piece. Very much prayer like with a very pleasant rhythm, lovely refrain, and a rhyme scheme that enhances rather than detracts. I especially liked:

    "Whilst rivers floods, float love to speech"

    and the way the anxiety of "floods" leads right into the hope of "floats". Very nicely done.
    "As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light of meaning in the darkness of mere being." --Carl Gustav Jung

    "To absent friends, lost loves, old gods, and the season of mists; and may each and every one of us always give the devil his due." --Neil Gaiman; The Sandman Vol. 4: Season of Mists

    "I'm on my way, from misery to happiness today. Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh" --The Proclaimers

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