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Thread: The Old Woman and the Dog

  1. #1
    Original Poster Buh4Bee's Avatar
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    The Old Woman and the Dog

    part I, of II parts


    The widow was left alone in her house at 75 years of age in perfect health. She was independent, rode a tractor, and had cut her own finger off when she chopped her wood for the winter stove.

    She woke every morning at 6:00 to heat the kettle and let the dog out. Ebby, her dear, was her final companion in this life before she would spend the last remaining years alone. She would not admit this, but she loved the dog.

    He was not allowed on the furniture or her bed, but he had his own bed on the floor. She vacuumed his bed once a week. When she left him alone, he whimper at the door and stared out until she returned, then he was happy again.

    She called him a pest and nuances, but he shared her coffee every morning. Ebby followed her around the kitchen, getting underfoot, by waiting for her to sit and give him her coffee. Every morning, at least once, she yell, “Get out of the way!” And he dance around her feet excitedly for the saucer of coffee.

    Placing her dishes on the table, she then leaned over and filled his dish with exactly three quarters of a cup of kibble. She pulled out her chair, sat, opened the paper and began sipping her coffee to slowly wake up.

    She looked over the paper and yell, “You damn dog.” It would wait for its saucer before it ate its kibble. She tipped the coffee and splashed a taste into the saucer and placed it on the floor. Ebby was well trained and knew to wait until she lifted her hand away before jumping on the saucer.

    She smiled as she drank her next sip. No one had enjoyed such simplicity with her as much as this dog. Sometimes she looked at him and thought, what would he say if he could talk. I love you?

    Their morning moved on. Dot had a washer and drier that she never used. She washed her underwear in the sink and hung it on hangers in the shower to dry. She was busy doing this as the dog lay on his bed chewing a bone. He listened to her wash as he chewed and he knew she was close by.

    The morning sun flooded the picture window. The light was glorious as she quietly prayed and quilted while rejoicing in this moment. She then turned her attention to the TV and paused to rest her hands and back. She was old, but yet she still had much energy. Life was lovely, especially in the spring.

    The TV shows moved through the timetable, but she was distracted by good thoughts, a few memories, and criticism of younger great grandchildren. It was funny how quilting was a working meditation. Then she saw the time and realized she may be late for her afternoon date with her daughter if she didn’t move along.

    Standing slowly she yelled, “Lunch Ebby!” Lunch was much simpler than breakfast, because Ebby was patient and there was no kibble to ignore and irritate Dot. Ebby got to lick the Stoffer’s plastic pan after Dot was done with lunch. He sat at her feet as she read another section of the newspaper. Lunch was pleasant.

    After the licking frenzy, the dog recognized the rush of Dots feet shuffling to get ready to go out. He always assumed he would go too as often this was the case. He hopped about hopefully, until Dot hissed at him and told him to settle down.

    She stood by the door after she put on her coat and Ebby sat looking at her with perked ears. “Alright you little nuisance, let’s put on your leash. We are going to visit Eli, your big friend.” Ebby got up and wiggled about as he knew he was going for a ride to see his best friend Eli.

    Dot drove a big red truck with a pink racing stripe on the side. As she pulled out, her neighbor smiled and waved back as he saw the old woman and the dog drive away, like a pair of carefree teenagers. It really was a lovely and humorous sight, and Dot knew it.

    The dogs were happily playing in Dot’s daughter fenced in outdoor kennel. The two ladies sat on the outside and drank ice tea with peppermint. Dot’s daughter knew that Dot had been deprived of a good marriage. Her husband had been an alcoholic, although a non-violent one. The absence of a partner, made Dot into a bitter mother, feeling challenged by the demands of her 4 children and no careers outlet to gain self-satisfaction from. Somehow the youngest of her children had maintained a harmonious relationship with her.

    “Eli, cookies!”, Anna said as she threw carrots over the fence. These cookies were like finding Heaven to Ebby. To him it was like eating a cannoli for the first time. Oh, the virgin moment of a dog’s discovery of the sweet juices of a carrot.

    He rooted for all the carrots, until they were gone. His salivation was strung across the grass as he sniffed, hoping for one last morsel. Anna, laughing, threw a few more over and turned back to talk to her mother. She enjoyed her mother’s pleasure that she took from the dog. Growing up, she was so seldom happy. Now that her father was dead, sadly Dot smiled more often.

  2. #2
    Registered User Steven Hunley's Avatar
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    response to story

    I'm so glad you posted something, and so glad as well that it, like you, didn't disappoint. I'd make the third from the last paragraph line, "...her 4 children, with no other carreer option open to her from which to gain self satisfaction."or "She was always feeling challenged by the demands of her four children, who seemed, though she didn't want to admit it, to leave her no other career options. Self satisfaction from an outside challenge is what she needed." Something like that. I don't want to nit pick, but I feel this is an important point to make, as this character is in a position here that many women are in, and many readers should be able to relate to it. Now, the good stuff. The line "no one had enjoyed simplicity with her..." is a jewel.
    Also the line "Oh, the virgin moment of a dog's discovery..." can't be beat. Your last line has me wondering, that's for sure. is that a tease or how you meant it? For a woman who's temporarily "disabled" as you put it, you sure can write good, girl. Take care, and after you've exploded, post part two please.

  3. #3
    Original Poster Buh4Bee's Avatar
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    I felt some pressure to post something so you could see what I write like. It's not done and it really is a draft. I have a few other things I could post, but am not finished with yet. I was hoping you would read and respond. So thanks.

    I'm glad you like it and it didn't disappoint. There is nothing worse than that. I will finish it in the enxt few days.

    The story is not done, so the last line is sort of just hanging there. May make more sense when I add the next part.

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    I liked the story , it bid me to follow even though there was undoubtedly not going to be a climax. And I was happy with the way the story ended. I didn't feel like the last line was "hanging there". I thought it was just a simple ending to a simple story. The story was good. And you write well.

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    Loved your story.
    Agree with Steven Hunley on this being a jewel of a statement"No one had enjoyed such simplicity with her as much as this dog." You captured the bond between a human and a dog and their shared love

  6. #6
    Original Poster Buh4Bee's Avatar
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    Thank you for reading, but the story is not done.

  7. #7
    Talks to the Animals IJustMadeThatUp's Avatar
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    I'd love to read more. I want to know what happens!
    "Oh the clever
    Things I should say to you
    They got stuck somewhere
    Stuck between me and you"

  8. #8
    My mind's in rags breathtest's Avatar
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    Cool! You're love for dogs is so pure and lively. I loved the bit about the dog always wanting to share her coffee. That is so funny and exactly the kind of weird things that dogs do. Each dog has it's own strange but wonderful habit that is just fascinating. And yeah i think you've captured everything nicely. It's a lovely piece of writing which i implore you to finish for the purely selfish reason that I WANT TO READ MORE. NOW.
    'For sale: baby shoes, never worn'. Hemingway

  9. #9
    Original Poster Buh4Bee's Avatar
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    Hey Breathtest, Thanks for reading. I'm in the process of editing the ending piece.
    jersea

  10. #10
    Original Poster Buh4Bee's Avatar
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    second half

    second half:

    It had been one of those days that you don’t want to end, because everything had been wonderful. To continue the indulgent state, Dot ate a piece of pie for dinner. She again fed the dog exactly three quarters of a cup of kibble. He usually jumped on his evening meal, but this time, he sat there, staring at Dot as she ate her pie.

    “Well, what’s wrong now?” Dot looked at the untouched food bowl and thought maybe a storm was coming. Ebby had horrible anxiety around thunder and usually hid under her bed. But there had been no mention of that on the news or in the paper; clear skies for the next five days. Wonderful spring weather!

    Dot finished her pie and read the last of the paper while the dog stared out the door. What on earth was this strange behavior? “Are you sick? Do you need to go out?” she asked him. She clipped on his leash and let the door open. He nearly pulled the old women down the stairs in the direction of her daughter’s house.

    Dot yanked him back into the house and realized that it was those damn carrots. To confirm her theory she gave him a few carrots she had in the fridge and this stopped the moping. He then went and finished his dinner. He had very similar eating habits as his owner.

    Dot couldn’t resist and had to call her daughter and explain about the sudden strange love affair the animal had with carrots. “Have you ever heard of anything so crazy?”

    The next day was indeed a beautiful day and Dot had the garden and winter wood to think about. She tied up Ebby on the tree, where he always went when she worked outside. When she was out of his line of vision he yelped for her. Once he had put on such a ridiculous display that her neighbor had come to sooth the poor creature.

    On this particular day, Dot thought it strange how quiet he was while she was pulling more sticks out of the woods. That long buried maternal instinct awoke and rung and said something was amiss. So dropping her sticks, and walked out of the woods worried the dog had gotten free of his line. But no, his head was buried in the soil, EATING HER GARDEN CARROTS!

    Rage filled her soul as she ran to the animal oblivious of her presence and yanked him out of the ground like a beheaded carrot top himself. She went to smash his face in with her fist. The terror that flashed in her eye made Ebby yelp and curl into a little bug and she dropped him to the ground. He had never experienced such fright from his beloved owner. He waddled over behind the tree to lick himself with his tail between his legs.

    She went into the house to stand at the window and cry. This is why she hated any kind of companionship at all. There were a few certain things she couldn’t tolerate and when she lost her temper, there was a complete loss of self control. The rage and maternal instinct were two sides of the same coin that she always carried around in her pocket.

    She had admittedly beaten all four of her children at one time or another. If she hadn’t no one would have set them straight. They were all out of jail and drug and alcohol free. To Dot, this statistic was the justification and benefit of the beatings. However, two were divorced and three would barely talk to her.

    She stood at the window harboring all this grief and she watched the dog go back to the garden to eat more carrots. She let out a dark laughed through her sobs, after all he was a dog, and what did a dog know.

    This was the great paradox in loving an animal as if it were human. You couldn’t hold it to the same standards as you would a child, but you received an infinite amount of love. The temptation to love it in an unnatural way always hung about, especially when there was nothing else to fill the void. Maybe if she had held her children to the standards of a dog, things would have turned out differently.

    Dot wiped her tears as there was a knock on her door. It was her neighbor who plowed her driveway. “Hello, I brought you some cranberry and orange muffins,” he yelled through the screen.

    “Ooh the muffins, I’m coming.” She popped into the bathroom just to be sure she look decent. Although Dot was 75, she still retained some of her youthful beauty. She needed the pick-me-up of a vain self-admiration to return from past regrets to her wrinkled reflection in the mirror.

    She opened the door to her neighbor and invited him in.
    “Dot, do you know Ebby is in your garden?”
    “Oh the little beast,” she said as she looked out the window at him again. He had done quite a bit of damage, but she had recovered. It was time to bring him in. She pulled back on his leash as he tugged to get into the house to sniff the neighbor. Ebby was a hound after all.

    Together they assessed the damage and discussed Ebby’s new found love of carrots. It was evident to Lawrence as well, because Ebby ignored the milk biscuit Dot had dropped on the floor for him to eat. He smelled Lawrence and then went back to the door to smell the air for carrots. Dot watched him raise his nose to inhale the spring air and she smiled at this naughty harmless obsession.

  11. #11
    Registered User Steven Hunley's Avatar
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    You might want to change,...lost her temper, her self control went with it..." and 'she let out a dark laugh between her sobs" The bits "yanked him out of the ground like a beheaded carrot top himself" is incomparable, as is "if she had held her children to the standards of a dog..." This is warm funny, compassionate, insightful. Now, of course, I expect all your stuff to be so good. that's pressure now isn't it? Oh yeah, I suspect that the author of this piece is the same way, at least up to the point where she looses her temper. But hey, it's just fiction right?

  12. #12
    My mind's in rags breathtest's Avatar
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    Yeah i agree with Steven Huntley. 'warm, funny, compassionate, insightful'.

    It's wonderful to read.
    'For sale: baby shoes, never worn'. Hemingway

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