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Thread: Follow The Red Rabbit.

  1. #1
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    Talking Follow The Red Rabbit.

    18th Century London - A series of mass disappearances in town and outlying villages began to become more and more frequent. The local officials were baffled as the victims seemed to vanish from their homes without a trace in the middle of the night... and was documented by many people at the time. In each isolated incident, a detailed painting of a decapitated rabbit's head was splashed on the walls of the victim's room using blood. The rabbit depicted was of a darker, twisted nature almost akin to that of something from a nightmare. After months of these "vanishings" as they were being called they stopped as suddenly as they began.
    Now fast forward to the present day and age. October 31st, 2009. Local police arrive at the Fenwick estate and pull up through the driveway to the mansion. There was a report of a disturbance at the residence in question and repeated reports of loud music and screaming. As the officers kicked in the door to the estate they were shocked - blood was everywhere, furniture overturned, broken beer bottles, the remnants of what looked like a party gone wrong. The music was still blaring and there was some sort of thumping sound upstairs. The officers sent two ahead to investigate while looking downstairs for clues as to what happened.
    Unholstering their handguns the duo silently crept upwards, making their way down the hall to the room at the end where the door was ajar, a bloody handprint on the white walls near the door frame. "This is the L.A.P.D.! If anyone's in there come out with your hands up!" Shouted officer Mcullin. Seconds go by...and nothing but the thumping sound issuing from that room. Mcullin give the count to three on his fingers and the two officers rush inside, guns drawn, expecting a crime in progress and instead are met with a horror unimaginable.
    A decayed, rotting, half rabbit-half man thing was painting on the walls a portrait of himself with...blood? He turned to face them, grinning but still painting. "Freeze!" Shouted Mcullins deputy. But the rabbit just stood there, grinning all the while. Suddenly officer bradley went stark white and began shaking violently, dropping his gun. Was it Mcullen or was Bradley fading ever so slightly? His outline slowly deteriorating from view. The rabbit whispers, what seemed like a lover's breathy promise, "It has begun again. The past and the present collide in a bloody embrace in the realm of shadows and my mark be upon thee."
    With inhuman speed the rabbit had grabbed mcullin's wrist and wrenched the gun from his hand tossing it aside. He stared, dumbstuck, as the rabit passed his other paw over the inside of his wrist and a mark was left in place of the nothing that was once there. A bloody rabbit's head, similar to the thing before him. "Now you shall follow me to the abyss, as the other dead ones have, and your actions will decide the fate of all..."
    The rabbit stunk. It reeked of carrion and blood, sweat, and urine. It smelled of death itself. Mcullen was beginning to feel light headed, he could hear his fellow officers running upstairs towards him but as he dropped to his knees and hit the floor he was already dissolving. He looked down and where his legs should have been there was...nothing. Slowly other parts of him disappeared... as he ebbed away into unconsciousness. It didn't hurt, but was this what death felt like? Slipping away into nothingness? The last thing he remembered the rabbit say to him was "When we meet again, o honored dead one, it will be on the battlefield. Remember this kindness that was showed to you this day, and choose your side carefully lest you wind up on the headsmans block or worse." and then he knew no more.



    Soooo...should i continue? or give up lol?
    Last edited by King; 12-13-2009 at 05:20 AM.

  2. #2
    Tea (and book) Addict Jazz_'s Avatar
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    It's not bad - I like the 300 year gap (adds mystery). Not too sure about some things - (an evil rabbit-thing?) and the lines of the rabbit are a tad... heavy-handed, something more subtle might be more chilling.

    Otherwise good, I like the fact that the victims disappear, and the blood print that's left. I would probably read more

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