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Thread: a recent poem

  1. #1
    My mind's in rags breathtest's Avatar
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    Apr 2009
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    a recent poem

    Lights lights lights lights lights
    Artificial lights
    Naked under salon lights
    Emptiness of strobe lights
    Lamp-light thick and penetrating presses against the eyes
    Sun-light undresses and entombs bodies
    Vast factory lights utterly hollow, long and distant and distracted
    Skinny beam of torch-light always searching never satisfied
    Lights to tell us we are allowed to move
    Mysterious red laser death
    Headlights probing granite, stone graves
    Light most wholesome is morgue light – not because of the glow, but true flesh,
    pale and indistinct, gaunt silent figures laid to rest on metal table, and then filed
    away, labelled, numbered, to await final cataloguing
    Light most final is darkness, heavy, invading, brooding, complete
    No light like darkness
    No darkness like forever

    This poem i wrote one lonely night in a strange motel room a few weeks ago. I hope you will read and comment
    'For sale: baby shoes, never worn'. Hemingway

  2. #2
    ^My Pen Name^ Justin Rockwell's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Pretty good, the imagery, structure, and uses of light is on another level.

    please return the feedback.....

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