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Thread: Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

  1. #6406
    Registered User SilentMute's Avatar
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    How come I get the idea that Lake Idiot was developed by someone who was really into belated Planned Parenthood?
    I don't care if the glass is half full or half empty, I'm just glad to have a glass.

  2. #6407
    sound of music soundofmusic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Atheist View Post

    I'll keep the men warm and the wine cold for ya!




    Having a lovely case of hyperprostatism, I will be failing on all counts.

    I think we'd better try watermelon seed-spitting.
    So good to see the men are all warmed with Drambouie. Ah yes, watermelon seed spitting does sound a bit more equal opportunity; though, I'm not sure we grow watermelons with seeds anymore.
    Oh guys, it was tough at work, yet another group of people with no chairs, silverware, plates or toilet paper....

    Quote Originally Posted by Hawkman View Post
    Can I crash your party? I can bring a friend!



    and I can supply a novelty act. If you don't like it we can put in the burgers.

    Wow Hawkman, where did you did up my mother in law from, I thought she had passed.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle View Post
    Haha!
    I wonder which head calls the shots when a hungry lion is hot on your hoofs?

    .....

    Now this next item is truly worthy of its own thread, but I figured it would fit in fine here and besides, it gives us even more reason to celebrate...

    According to Wikipedia under "On This Day" in history category we have three events we must bring attention to:

    753 BC – Romulus and Remus founded Rome, according to the calculations by Roman scholar Varro Reatinus.


    1509 – Henry VIII (pictured) became King of England, following the death of his father Henry VII, eventually becoming a significant figure in the history of the English monarchy.

    The 3rd and most important event in history:

    1836 – Texan forces led by Sam Houston defeated General Antonio López de Santa Anna and his Mexican troops in the Battle of San Jacinto near La Porte, the decisive battle in the Texas Revolution.



    ^Santa Anna is standing in the white breeches, Sam Houston is on blanket due to injury and Deaf Smith is on one knee straining to hear with hand cupped at ear.
    Well, in my experience, with most big things, the head is never calling the shots. Ah let's celebrate Dear Henry and the Twins...kind of lost in American history.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sancho View Post
    Hawkman's in! (with friends) Bienvendidos amigo.

    Silent, we've gotta get Harris on board for the hoedown. It just won't be the same without him.

    Update: We've had a minor setback in the preparations. Lefty was on his way from Alabama in his truck when:



    First let me say that Lefty's okay. He's complaining about a ringing in his ears, but otherwise he didn't get a scratch. He says it'll be a while before he gets his truck running again, and it looks like we'll to have to find our fireworks for the shindig elsewhere.

    ^maybe in the Republic of Texas
    Was it lefty that got that pole blown into the top of his head, has plenty of fire power, just can't remember where he left it.

    Quote Originally Posted by SilentMute View Post
    Alas, I too lack the equipment for the peeing contest...which is a pity, for my large bladder does have a long duration. Now, if there is an event of how often you have to go, my mom and I--I am certain--will leave you fellows in the dust. I think we have an advantage there being girls, who for some reason, were designed to constantly have to run to the bathroom. Maybe the powers that be believed we needed an excuse to powder our noses.

    I used to be quite good at drinking liquids and blowing them out my nose, which earned me some fame in my grade school days. However, I once tried to do it with a Coca-cola, and that was painful.

    I should mention that my invisible friend has decided to crash the party. If you guys see me talking to myself, I assure you I am not having a psychotic break...I'm just talking to my invisible friend. However, for the other guests who don't quite know me, can you just tell them I have Bluetooth so I don't get a reputation.
    I don't know if I'd let her invisible friend come to the party, he's totally out of control. He is always telling jokes when I walk naked from the shower to my room.

  3. #6408
    sound of music soundofmusic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hawkman View Post
    Seeing as some people seem to be careless with matches, Silent Mute's bladder might come in handy if the local fire department aren't on hand!
    I always say, there is a South park for every occasion.
    http://www.southparkstudios.com/clip...-their-teacher

  4. #6409
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    Ok, ok enough is enough. I don't want to be a wet blanket but this party is beginning to sound a little dangerous - fire, guns, explosives, alcohol,high velocity melon seeds.

    I think we are going to need the emergency services in attendance.
    ay up

  5. #6410
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    I'm all for the dancing girls, but don't let the Hoff sing!

    Sound: Well the idea was ok, the kids just didn't have big enough bladders

    and by the way, which one is your Mother in law? If we're dealing with reincarnation here it could be hard to tell, but I can tell you that the giraffe is a bull, cause I checked. Can't say for certain about the two-headed zebra.

    Is there any chance we can book ZZ Top? the way they spin their instruments is soooo cooool!
    Last edited by Hawkman; 04-24-2013 at 05:33 AM.

  6. #6411
    Registered User SilentMute's Avatar
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    Tell David Hasselhoff to come in his cool car Kitt...oh, wait, wrong series. And absolutely under no circumstances do we allow him to sing. He was cute in his day and had a neat car, but not a great singer.
    I don't care if the glass is half full or half empty, I'm just glad to have a glass.

  7. #6412
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    We could just invite the car

  8. #6413
    running amok Sancho's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SilentMute View Post
    How come I get the idea that Lake Idiot was developed by someone who was really into belated Planned Parenthood?
    I watched a game of Lake Idiot once where the tables were turned. The idiot donned a football helmet (hard plastic, American-style Football helmet) and started aiming his head at the cannonballers. It never occurred to me until that moment that somebody could actually change their trajectory in flight. Those who couldn't suffered a few of broken ribs. What a game.

    Quote Originally Posted by soundofmusic View Post
    ...Was it lefty that got that pole blown into the top of his head, has plenty of fire power, just can't remember where he left it...
    That was Phineas Gage, Lefty's great grandpappy. Phineas was a demolitions expert for the railroad. One day he was basting rock when a charge went off prematurely, driving a metal rod through his cheek and out the top of his head, taking his left eye and much of his frontal lobe with it. He survived. In fact, I don't think he even lost consciousness. He did have dramatic personality change afterwards though. < That's a true story (except for the Lefty part)

    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    Ok, ok enough is enough. I don't want to be a wet blanket but this party is beginning to sound a little dangerous - fire, guns, explosives, alcohol,high velocity melon seeds.

    I think we are going to need the emergency services in attendance.
    Safety's for sissies. Unless, of course,the first responders are wearing a red spandex one-piece.

    Help! Help! I'm in need of assistance!
    Uhhhh...

  9. #6414
    The Ghost of Laszlo Jamf islandclimber's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hawkman View Post
    I'm all for the dancing girls, but don't let the Hoff sing!
    You mean no Hooked On a Feeling? If we could get a reenactment of this video it might be worth it?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJQVlVHsFF8

  10. #6415
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sancho View Post
    That was Phineas Gage, Lefty's great grandpappy. Phineas was a demolitions expert for the railroad. One day he was basting rock when a charge went off prematurely, driving a metal rod through his cheek and out the top of his head, taking his left eye and much of his frontal lobe with it. He survived. In fact, I don't think he even lost consciousness. He did have dramatic personality change afterwards though. < That's a true story (except for the Lefty part)

    Then there was his maternal Uncle ol' Hop-along-one-eyed-stumpy-the-eunuch.
    ay up

  11. #6416
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by islandclimber View Post
    You mean no Hooked On a Feeling? If we could get a reenactment of this video it might be worth it?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJQVlVHsFF8
    Respect to The Hoff! That could be the greatest music vid I've ever seen
    ay up

  12. #6417
    running amok Sancho's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    Then there was his maternal Uncle ol' Hop-along-one-eyed-stumpy-the-eunuch.
    "Lucky," for short.

    As for Hoff's video, I can do the Ooga-Ooga-Ooga-Shakas
    Uhhhh...

  13. #6418
    Orwellian The Atheist's Avatar
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    This party's going to be so good I think even Hoff singing couldn't dampen it. We can always use him as the first target at Lake Idiot anyway. With all the alcohol about, he'll be drunk after the first half hour anyway.

    Quote Originally Posted by soundofmusic View Post
    Oh guys, it was tough at work, yet another group of people with no chairs, silverware, plates or toilet paper....
    You can stay for whole duration; you sound like you could do with a week of relaxation, debauchery & booze.

    And gentlemen.


    Quote Originally Posted by Hawkman View Post
    Is there any chance we can book ZZ Top? the way they spin their instruments is soooo cooool!
    Now we're talking!

    The watermelon-seed spitting will get them along for sure.

    I've booked Muse for the last night.

    (I'm not sure buying copious fireworks is a good idea right now!)
    Go to work, get married, have some kids, pay your taxes, pay your bills, watch your tv, follow fashion, act normal, obey the law and repeat after me: "I am free."

    Anon

  14. #6419
    Clinging to Douvres rocks Gilliatt Gurgle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    Ok, ok enough is enough. I don't want to be a wet blanket but this party is beginning to sound a little dangerous - fire, guns, explosives, alcohol,high velocity melon seeds.

    I think we are going to need the emergency services in attendance.
    "Help, help, my leg is cramping up.
    Please hurry...oh and send one of the girls"
    ...

    "Are you OK?"
    "No, my leg is cramped, I can't swim."
    "Your going to be OK, can you still use your hands?"
    "Oh yessss"
    "Good, just grab on to me, anywhere your able to hold on tight"
    "Anywhere?...yes ma'am!

    (aside) - tomorrow, I'll feign jelly fish attack hehe
    "Mongo only pawn in game of life" - Mongo

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKRma7PDW10

  15. #6420
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle View Post
    "Help, help, my leg is cramping up.
    Please hurry...oh and send one of the girls"
    ...


    (aside) - tomorrow, I'll feign jelly fish attack hehe


    Yup, dangerous place, the hot-tub.
    Last edited by prendrelemick; 04-25-2013 at 02:51 AM.
    ay up

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