I Was Afraid (Please read...)

[Ace]

I walked through the field in my backyard to the church where my love and I first kissed. I miss her greatly... and I think this is one of my best poems. It's my favorite. That's why I want people to read...


I Was Afraid

Walking along the church in the morning mist
I find myself standing in the place we first kissed
I look up to the sky and watch the orange meet blue
The trees light like torches and the day is a new

We laid down in the grass right next to the road
Ignoring the dew that made us feel it had snowed
We shared our secrets and I expressed my feeling
Too afraid to kiss you like a child caught stealing

You leaned into me and kissed me right then
Your lips made me feel like the luckiest of men
It did not take long for those feelings to grow
Soon enough the cold dew turned into snow

The winter was rough and spring almost came
Your feelings had changed, they just weren't the same
I blamed the winter and I dismissed any thought
Of you changing heart and leaving me to rot

So of course it came about to me as a surprise
When you declared our separation with tearless, dry eyes
I was crushed but I would not cry in front of you
It appears my greatest fear had finally come true

I stand here now feeling so alone and depressed
It seems for the time my recovery has regressed
Caught in the past, happy memories fill my mind
My life long love I no longer have to find

It is still you and it always will be so
Too afraid to kiss first then too in love to let go
Now my only fear is that you will get hurt
Or forget of when we first kissed on wet grass and dirt

[Angelic Devil]

"The trees light like torches and the day is a new"
<3 this line so much!!

"We shared our secrets and I expressed my feeling
Too afraid to kiss you like a child caught stealing"
you could re-write this in another way, this doesn't sound nice to my ear (reader's ear.)

"Soon enough the cold dew turned into snow
The winter was rough and spring almost came"

I love this line for it expresses the change of seasons as well as the change of emotion. Good thought inserted in there and I very much admire the fact that as the snow has melted away, from winter to spring, it combines feelings with the seasons. And also while one is used to spring being the season of "blossoming and love", you contradict that idea when you show that her feelings have "melted" when spring came, just as the snow goes, and spring comes by. (If that makes sense, it is night time and I might sound off track.)


"It is still you and it always will be so
Too afraid to kiss first then too in love to let go
Now my only fear is that you will get hurt
Or forget of when we first kissed on wet grass and dirt"
I very much adore this!

That's all Imma say! I hope it was good

Cheers,
M

[skib]

A terribly sad tale indeed! Being afraid to let someone go is one of the hardest things to do, especially when you remember all too clearly the feelings you once shared. It hurts even more when they seem to have forgotten or not care. A very touching poem. I hope everything worked out okay!
P.S- the imagery in this poem was fantastic. It reminded me very much of a similar experience I had.

[Lynne Fees]

A beautiful poem and I hope you still don't feel so devastated. What I learned in doing a lot of dating before I got married was: It is like looking for a house; a permanent home. You see what you think is the perfect house; you fall in love with it; someone else gets makes a better offer and you lose it. Then, a few months later you find something even better and you're happy you "missed out" on the first one.
Very simplistic - sorry - but true nonetheless.

[Ace]

Thanks everyone. I love her will all of my being. It has been over 3 weeks since we broke up and I haven't been able to move on at all. I have lost all my confidence and all I think about is her. When I am with friends and family, I have nothing to contribute during conversations because she is all I think of.

I was suicidal earlier today. I love her and I cannot live without her. It is very complicated and I did not want to die just because of her, but that is the main reason.

[skib]

Well that is not a very good or fun place to be! Your pain will ease with time. I can commiserate with you on the topic of lost love- I lost all contact without warning with a girl I was sure I was going to marry. The pain has changed me forever, but I am a better person because of it. What helped me the most was to keep writing- and that is my advice to you. It will help keep from bottling up what you need to let out. Good luck, my friend!