Exactly what the title says.
I'm 18. And I need help. I'm tired of watching my best friends have boyfriends and coaching them through their love issues when in reality... I've never officially had a boyfriend. It's just never been the right time, or the right person. I consider myself a normal person; well, perhaps a bit more timid than most girls but not overly so, at least I don't think so. There are certainly girls out there who are waaaay more gorgeous than me but I believe it's more than just the physical... everybody needs to be seen for their individual qualities. And I just need to hear what other people have to say about it. I do know, though, that I'm not a partier; I don't drink or smoke or do any of that nasty stuff and it seems like that limits me some because parties are apparently the "it" place... whatever...
Here are my past "almost's" - just to get an idea of where I am right now... any and ALL advice would be greatly appreciated and taken into consideration... I am ready to make some changes here..
Boy #1: Hung out with him for a few weeks in the summer. He was a camp counselor at my barn (I ride horses) and I had the biggest crush on him. He was adorable and charming... a huge flirt though and after he got tired of me he just moved onto my friends... I never really thought far enough ahead to hope things would work out between us, but I did really, really like him. But, I was young and didn't really know how to handle the situation so it just kind of faded..
Boy #2: Met him through one of my good friends, she was dating his best friend and they thought it would be cute if we hooked up and went on double dates with them... well that night that I met him, I don't know why but physically we just hit it off.. aka a lot of ca-noodling - but nothing even remotely sexual happened. I knew it wouldn't work out from the beginning because he was a bit of a bum in school... I never even really liked him, I guess I just let myself go for a few hours... which was a bit exciting and I learned something from it.
Boy #3: We worked together. I liked him from the first day; it started with physical attraction and then just built from there. He was so sweet to me and I just kind of melted. After a few weeks though, I got kind of impatient and talked to him... he liked me too... but told me that he couldn't date me because I wasn't a Christian. Talk about a low blow. We tried to remain friends after that and we "hung out" but it being with him after that was just kind of painful, knowing that I liked him immensely but it would never work. It's been about a year and we are still friends, and we talk because we really were close (that was the closest I've come to a boyfriend) but of course that hurt.
Boy #4: He was in my Spanish class and we kind of hit it off. We were physically attracted, had the same interests (he didn't like to party either) so we exchanged numbers and planned to hang out sometime... I waited for him to call me.. and he never did. Once the semester ended, I saw that he was back with his ex-girlfriend.
Boy #5: He doesn't even count really but one day, we met by a crosswalk and definitely hit it off. We shared so many things in common and walked to our classes (I'm in college by now) together that day and we just could not stop talking to each other. I was fascinated by him. He lived in the same dorm complex so I saw him at the cafeteria sometimes and we'd chat some. One day he asked if he could join me for breakfast and I said sure. We talked again for a while and he asked me about parties and I told him I didn't really like party that much. Ever since then, the most we've said is "hey" and when I go for a "how are you?" he runs. What the heck? Did it all just depend on my answer to that one question? Like I said, he didn't really count... it just mystified me a bit...
If you've made it this far..... I thank you SO much for reading. I really look foward to hearing what you have to say. Please don't tell me that "partying is the only way" because I'm not doing it. I do go to "clean" parties, I am very social and LOVE to be with my friends... but the party scene, the "going out" scene.. is not for me.
What do I do? Should I change up my tactics? Try being bold? The most important thing to me is just being myself...
Anyway.. I've written enough. It's your turn!
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Join sports and activity clubs, do what you enjoy, and meet other people who like the things you do.
Originally Posted by limajean
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