Subject Poetry Contest.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

I honestly don't know what I'm going do to here.

It's going to be a tough row to hoe.
Something to entertain you during your evaluation... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tmZuWrpX98g
Good luck

[Melanie]

Love your sense of humor, Gilliatt. Intermission...what a great idea. I watched the youtube, funny stuff, and the end was amazing the way Stan Laurel could switch from the role of Lord back to his silly character so easily.

[prendrelemick]

Ok, as I type these thoughts I still have no idea who will get the nod.

Melanie has put some of herself into her entry, you can feel the personal involvement and the importance of the episode for her, that gives the poem an extra significance that is hard to resist. There are some great lines too - "to purge all his worldly essence". Your own lines are so much more engaging than the quoted parts.

Pendragon's entry is both clever and poetical, but also has a deeper meaning beyond the surface words. The quote about the uncertain note is a pertinent lesson for life - as the poem tells. I'd never heard it before but it could become one of my favourite quotes of all time.

As usual Darkmuse has posted an intriguing entry. What's the story? What's the message? It cranks up, there is a subtle menace and then gently releases and in the end teases.

Caician. This is one of those poems of yours that leave me scratching my head in puzzlement - but don't change.

YesNo, a bang on certain winner at any other time, well crafted, funny, engageing, mysterious, some brilliant lines - "unseduce him"- and "Hey! Gwendolyn's here!" - just great.

How can I not give it to Melanie?
But I love YesNo's
And Pendragon's .


So with my trumpet sounding very uncertainly and bearing in mind I'm not allowed to have a three way tie.....

I'll plump for MELANIE - because I felt an emotional nudge as I read her entry.

[cacian]

prendrelemick thank you and Melanie congratulations!!!

[Pendragon]

Thank you, prendrelemick, you are most kind! Congratulations for a well earned win, Melanie!!!

[Melanie]

Thank you everyone! I liked them all and was glad I didn't have to be the judge. I felt your pain prendrelemick. Well done to all. And thank you, for taking the time to write us all a thoughtful critique. I must say, your subject choice, "a message", was very inspiring and fun to do. I'll post a new subject within a few of hours

[Melanie]

The next subject is Flight.
...whether it be something that is caught up by the wind or,
to take flight as to flee or escape something, etc.
The deadline is July 15th.

[Dark Muse]

I Fly Home To You

I hovered upon the edge
on the verge of jumping,
to feel myself fall endlessly below,
to never know the end,
embraced finitely within the darkness.

I was poised for descent
with no where else left to go,
nowhere to turn, I left no space
for returns, I counted on no
escape routes.

But the moment I left myself go,
and waited for the inevitable drop,
gave myself to gravity's mercy,
I was overcome by a sudden weightlessness.

You were there, your words
in my ear give me strength,
and however badly I might fall,
your hands will catch me in the end,
and lift me up.

I watch the darkness begin to fade,
and feel the wind rush under me,
it bears me up, carries me through
the air, and I know I am free
because you refused to accept defeat.

You are my escape,
and you make the impossible a reality,
because of your love,
I defy gravity, you bestow my heart
the wings of Mercury, and I am born
away home to you.

[Pendragon]

Flight of the Bumblebee
(With my sincere apologies to Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov)

A bee buzzed beside my ear
A bumble bee all black and yellow
He was upset because I disturbed his feeding
He launched at me and did a dance
Easily dodging my frantic slapping
It was only a matter of time before he stung me
I've always been taught that those fragile wings
Should not allow the bee to fly...
Sometimes nature outweighs physics
Sometimes the way things are exceeds evolution
Sometimes science has to accept the improbable
Anyway, I just got stung by an angry flying bumblebee...

Pendragon
(C) 6252013

[YesNo]

The weather warms the summer day.
There's children swimming in the bay.
Connect to what? The guru may
Breathe deep and stay aware.

There's seagulls flying overhead.
In spite of what that guru said,
Our many flights have merely led
To distance everywhere.

Connect. Rise above.
Reconnect. Lace up love.
The serpent strengthens the bond.

The weather chills the winter day.
There's ice on ice upon the bay.
Connect to what? Tonight we may
Breathe deep to stay aware.

[prendrelemick]

canto 'o buried tales

When June comes in with mornings bright,
And Beds are showered with early light,
Then dreams sit near the waking eye,
And flights of fancy take to sky.

Then faces known and faces lost,
People loved and people crossed,
Parade across our REMing state,
Through Worlds and places we create.

Roads we trod and those not taken,
Lovers we knew and those forsaken,
The child we held is ours once more,
Our mother is standing at the door

From shadows deep and dark and dire,
Raised up from our subconscious mire,
Our deepest fears find face and form,
In shadowy figures intent on harm.

But morning swallows twittering high,
Return the Self behind the eye,
Reality comes in cascading,
And dreams are just an echo fading.


This poem is proof were it needed
Some of my stuff has not suceeded,
Poetic fail is demonstrated,
With tortured rhyme and rhythm castrated.

[cacian]

time flies

towards
the skies
fly the masts
of timeless pasts
the winds blow
high tideless and wide
but memories rise
purest and fast
landing is ride

[Melanie]

Enjoy this brief on-topic intermission while
I take a little time to choose a winner:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZ2SWXwoYwQ

The contest is now closed. Thank you everyone
for these excellent entries...I'll be back.

[Melanie]

Dark Muse - I read this several times which brought me from a literal and uncomfortable interpretation of "attempted suicide" to more of an imagined suicide of self turmoil and despair replaced by faith in your lover's healing devotion to restore the best in you. It's a beautiful love story...and I'm a sap for happy endings...from darkness to the freedom from self doubt.

cacian - very clever to pick fleeting "time" for the flight subject. I enjoyed this piece a lot.

predrelemick - i'll strike the last stanza because I liked everything about this poem. Many of your lines struck a chord with me. They had a realness to it and a familiarity where we can all relate. I could "feel" as I read many gems like, "faces known and faces lost", "people loved and people crossed", "roads we trod and those forsaken", and more. The there is a stanza in the middle that turns dark which adds a nice depth and balance to your poem. Every line well penned.

YesNo - Your 3-line stanza among the 4-line stanzas presented in minimally short sentences was unexpected and added intrigue to the flow. Nicely done.

Pendragon - This was a fun poem to read with an interesting fact that I'm not sure I ever knew before. I guess if the bumblebee is stubborn enough to defy the laws of physics then it stands to reason he'll have an attitude. The sting...you okay? I really liked the 3 lines in a row that all started with "sometimes" building a momentum to the punchline. Very well thought out.

There was a tie between prendrelemick and Dark Muse so I had to really think about it.

Congrats to Dark Muse! You made me think about the poem and when I eventually sorted it out, it left me with a real appreciation for unconditional love that knows no bounds. You orchestrated that message like a ballet. (Note: my spellcheck changed "bounds" to "blonds"...love knows no blonds, ha)

[Dark Muse]

Thank you very much this one did come from a very personal place.

I will have the next subject up soon, just need some time to think a good one up.