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Thread: Mr. Darcy...every women's dream man

  1. #46
    MANICHAEAN MANICHAEAN's Avatar
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    Come on ladies, admit it.
    You like a man that is a challenge!
    Darcy as portrayed is arrogant, rude, & shake your boots up, interesting?

    Get a man like that under some semblence of marital control & there is no such thing as a boring relationship!

  2. #47
    Registered User BookWorm_x's Avatar
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    With the risk of upsetting so many fan girls, I have never been a fan of Mr Darcy. He is arrogant, I mean, the way he treats Lizzie at the beginning of the novel is awful. He is definitely a snob, I mean it's just unforgivable the way he tells Lizzie he loves her despite his better judgement. And then the way he insults Lizzie's family. He also tears Jane Bingley apart, which I, being a huge fan of a the Bingley's, find irreconcilably terrible. Yes, to a certain extent, he redeems himself, but his behaviour and attitude should not be the kind of man a woman should aspire to find. But I really can not see what women see in him, and I don't think, realistically, women would want to marry someone like him. He is very cold and distant, even by the end of the novel, he hardly makes a huge declaration of true emotion.
    Knowledge is Power

  3. #48
    Registered User kiki1982's Avatar
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    I think people mainly misperceive Darcy as arrogant. I have the impression that Austen always made doubles of her characters.
    And yes, Darcy was a bit of a snob with the same principles as his aunt, but his reserved nature wasn't pride, it was rather shyness. Hence his sister's shyness and his lack of true emotion when he declares his love for Lizzie. He wasn't able to socialise, because he did not know how. That is different to not wanting to out of pride. Do not forget that that theory was actually put forward partly by Mrs Bennet herself who quickly changed her bad opinion of him hen Lizzie was engaged to him. Her bad opinion was only founded upon ane and Lizzie getting no attention whatsoever as most beautiful girls in Meriton. That was a personal offense no doubt.

    Bingley is easy going, but nothing much in the head. He needs to be lucky to find his big love, otherwise he'll end up like his youngest sister, Mrs Hurt (?). She went for the outside and ended up the wife of a drunkard. Caroline only wants Darcy because of his money. She couldn't care less about his principles.

    I think, on balance, Darcy could be more elligible than Bingley, if only for his mind. Imagine the topics of conversation between Bingley and Jane... They are also too nice, too complying with everyone to actually take matters in their own hands. Darcy at least knows what he thinks and believes in himself. And that is of much greater value than be attractive on the outside alone.
    One has to laugh before being happy, because otherwise one risks to die before having laughed.

    "Je crains [...] que l'me ne se vide ces passe-temps vains, et que le fin du fin ne soit la fin des fins." (Edmond Rostand, Cyrano de Bergerac, Acte III, Scne VII)

  4. #49
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    I want Mr. Darcy too. A David Rintoul Darcy <3

  5. #50
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    Yes, this is true, especially the fact that he was willing to change. It was so funny that in the book, he thought she would be flattered and automatically say yes, and even thought that she was anxiously waiting to hear his proposal, which explains his agitation just before he did... and then his shock that she refused, not out of pride from his insult, but out of repugnance since the day they had met! It must have been horrifying. I must admit, I always thought love should come softly, and not so dramatically, but this is also how I met a Darcy. Men rarely change when a woman judges them (who likes to be judged afterall, or who changes their ways after a harsh, critical tongue snaps at them?), but when they realize it's merely an innocent misconception, and that it's possible to change her mind (well, men are proud, so he must be really in love with her to humble himself). I thought that part of Mr. Darcy was so noble- and that even though he might not ever see her again, or win her, he went out of his way to become a better man, and gave Elizabeth a second chance. <3

  6. #51
    Registered User kiki1982's Avatar
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    Actually just thinking about that awful first proposal of Darcy. He's so sweet when he pulls out all the stops at Pemberley , but in view of what he says later, I think the key thing in his first proposal is not only that he presumes she will be honoured and flattered and of course accept (that was the pride and conceit he talked about), but that he expressed himself badly as so many shy people blurt out the wrong stuff, in spite of themselves. He just wanted to tell her he loved her ardently, despite all the prejudices in his mind and what he was taught, he can't help himself. That's quite nice, but he tells her in such a horrible way that it sounds almost as if she can be grateful that he deigns her good enough to bear his children, so to say. It's such a typical moment where you know you are digging a hole for yourself to fall into, and you know you are going to fall into it, and yet you also know that you can't stop it.

    As he finds her in his grounds, he is determined to see how the ground lies. Let's face it, he's a peacock with his tail permanently in the air: he's got his vast income, he's got his looks, he's got his house, he's got his mother who was of good breeding, he's got his house in town etc. Surely she can't ignore all of it, just because he is odious . If he can just... do his best. And then he turns into the most charming man! Maybe it is because he sees that the Gardiners are not people who marvel at him like Caroline Bingley, but who are genuine and honest people who are interested in the man Darcy, not in the man-who-lives-at-Pemberley Darcy. SO he can be relaxed, they will not judge him like Mrs Bennet. And then he tries out his sister. I always imagine that they go home together and he asks her what she, Eleanor, finds of Miss Bennet. His sister is an advantage, because, as a woman, she can talk more to Lizzie than Darcy can as he is a man. When he has tried that, he can propose again, but then the disaster with Lydia happens.
    The moment where Lizzie stays behind to read Jane's letter and Darcy comes to see her alone, you can sense what he is planning to do. He becomes more agitated as time draws on and this time he can't mess up like that first time, but then it is evident that this man Wickham stands in his way again. It is immediately clear what he needs to do: if her family is disgraced he can forget it.

    This is why we remember Darcy: he's the valliant knight who disinterestedly comes to the Bennets' rescue. Well, not totally disinterestedly .
    One has to laugh before being happy, because otherwise one risks to die before having laughed.

    "Je crains [...] que l'me ne se vide ces passe-temps vains, et que le fin du fin ne soit la fin des fins." (Edmond Rostand, Cyrano de Bergerac, Acte III, Scne VII)

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