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Thread: The Obsession

  1. #1
    Manny2
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    The Obsession

    I sit and think
    I think about you
    the things you do
    how you pretend and lie
    just are so fake

    you make me envy
    envy what you have
    and what you had

    The one good thing you had
    you threw away
    and it came to me
    now your back
    just to take it from me
    thats all I ponder about
    thats all I think

    I think your out to get me
    but it is I who makes it that way
    for you have done nothing to me
    showed no interest in me
    or the what it is that i have
    but all I can do

    Sit and think
    that your out to get me
    and what I have

    I go out of my way
    just to make sure you cant
    take that thing that I have
    which I convinced myself you want
    and that your out to get me
    but the thing i have is not just a thing
    it is a person, a friend
    rather the most important person to me

    I think you want him back
    but he is not yours to take
    I sit and obsess
    wait for you to do so
    but it will not happen
    for he is mine
    and not yours to take
    Last edited by manny2; 11-09-2007 at 08:57 AM.
    "You may win some, you may lose some, but you'll never be there again"

  2. #2
    Wow that has this amazing effect, it makes me read through the lines really fast... I don't know if you intended for that to happen or wheather it is just me but that is pretty cool. I like your poem, its good.

  3. #3
    Manny2
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    It Was Not I Who Hurt You

    Are you one to stop me from going somwhere
    doing what I have to do
    this is my life, I should control it
    not you
    no matter if you get me places
    this is my life, i do as i do
    maybe you got hurt
    and need to be fixed
    but it is not I who hurt you
    why do you blame me
    for the ones that run into you
    blame the guy behind you
    who really hurt you
    because it was not I
    I would take better care of you

    oh my poor car
    it has been hit
    and wont take me places
    what am I to do
    a car should not control what I do
    this is my life
    why is my car stopping me
    from doing what I usually do

    are we so dependent on our cars
    that we are unable to go on with life
    without one for a week or two
    oh my poor car
    what am I to do
    for it will not take me places
    not now nor anytime soon
    "You may win some, you may lose some, but you'll never be there again"

  4. #4
    Ditsy Pixie Niamh's Avatar
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    I've merged the two together in one thread. Because this is a busy part of the forum there is a limit of one thread per day(see the please read sticky notice at top of forum). But if you create a single thread for all your poems you can post as many as you wont a day.
    "Come away O human child!To the waters of the wild, With a faery hand in hand, For the worlds more full of weeping than you can understand."
    W.B.Yeats

    "If it looks like a Dwarf and smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf (or a latrine wearing dungarees)"
    Artemins Fowl and the Lost Colony by Eoin Colfer


    my poems-please comment Forum Rules

  5. #5
    Manny2
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    thanks RPMI, dont really no what affect i was going for honestly, i was just writing : )
    "You may win some, you may lose some, but you'll never be there again"

  6. #6
    Inexplicably Undiscovered
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    If you don't mind a suggestion, your pieces could use a bit more specificity-- tell us the "things" the subject of your piece actually does. The more images, sounds, real-life allusions you can add to your work the more it breathes.

  7. #7
    Manny2
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    thanks for the suggestion! but for "the obsession" the whole point of saying thing so many times is because you dont find out tell the end, if you notice i change "thing" into person , thanks for the help, i changed some of the lines earlier on!
    "You may win some, you may lose some, but you'll never be there again"

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