Lymerick

[YesNo]

In heaven we’re cured of our vices.
In hell nothing’s cured but the prices
Are outrageous and may
Inflate any day
And good coffee’s as dear as fresh ice is.

[Pompey Bum]

In Heaven the coffee's sublime
And they serve it with cream all the time.
But down in the fire
They use a supplier:
The same as United Airlines'.

[Pompey Bum]

Oh, why can't two words simply rhyme
Exactly? Would it be a crime
If verbiage bent
To poetic intent
At the end of each metrical lime?

[YesNo]

Those allowing a rhyme that is slant
Just encourage those poets who can’t
Figure out how to rhyme
Any lemon or lime.
Any nose knows a rose is a plant.

[Pompey Bum]

A limerick's a rhythm precise;
It requires a roll of the dice.
Never jump for a fast rhyme
For there on the last line
You still have to rhyme with--oh Chrsit!

[Pompey Bum]

There was a big fuss called Convention
That stirred up internal dissension;
We're stronger together
Sang birds of a feather,
And other poetic invention.

[YesNo]

There’s nothing more enjoyable than a political convention to give one that rush of meaningfulness

Those conventions I’m planning to miss
Where the bull looks for someone to kiss.
There are words and replies
Wound-up cheering and cries
Then the bull hits the fan spraying bliss.

[Pompey Bum]

Too speedily comes the election,
The people's own sovereign selection.
Will it be the old lass
With the pantsuited *ss
Or her rival, the orange erection?

[YesNo]

Useless victories predict a loss.
Unexpectedly give them a toss.
When you push on some fat
It reacts much like that
And I wonder who’s really the boss?

[Sancho]

There once was a confab in Philly
Which contrasted Cleveland's silly
Mr. Kahn gets credit
The Dem's didn't edit
At the end of the day I'm for Hilly

[YesNo]

The monster was happy he had
A damsel but she wasn’t glad.
She had a pet dragon
She rode as a wagon
Whom her monster shot down being bad.

[Pompey Bum]

There once was a shy necromancer
Who never made much of a dancer;
He tangoed a specter,
Then bashfully pecked her:
She vanished in flame for an answer.

[YesNo]

Dancing requires some skill
To make gravity play with you, still
If you fall in her lap
She might give you a slap,
Or worse, let you do what you will.

[Pompey Bum]

There once was a limerick I made:
Its second line shocked an old maid;
Its third line was rude
(As it ended in "nude"),
But its fourth could have got a nun laid.

[Pompey Bum]

There once was a limerick I wrote
Describing a randy old goat.
It tended to corny
With wordplay on horny,
And could rhyme only with petticoat.