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Thread: Form Poem Contest

  1. #76
    Registered User the silent x's Avatar
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    could you explain the petrarch in "caveman speak"(really dumbed down) i got lost reading your description, just give me the requirements please
    life philosophy: "if one wants to succeed, they must become independent, if one wants to be independent, one must strive past the dificulties, using them to shape future desicions, like a sword being folded, every fold is a hardship overcome, and every fold removes one more imperfection that would destroy the completed version"

    # of 1st Dans, Black Belts achieved- 2 (1 Hapkido, Sun Moo Kwan), (1 Tae Kwon Do)

  2. #77
    Ditsy Pixie Niamh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by the silent x View Post
    could you explain the petrarch in "caveman speak"(really dumbed down) i got lost reading your description, just give me the requirements please
    Ok the form of the poem is this,
    Petrarchan;
    Octave (8 lines) split into two Quatrains (groups of 4 lines)the first carries the same theme into the second.
    then there is a Sestet (6 lines, last three used as conclusion) new theme int first three lines leading to the conclusion in the last three.
    abba,abba, cde,cde.
    laid out with eight lines space six lines

    Shakespearian
    three Quatrains (groups of 4 lines) three separate themes
    then a couplet (2 lines for conclusion)
    abab,cdcd,efef,gg
    No spaces

    The Patrick kavanagh poem is both of these and is laid out like this;
    Laid out in Octave and sestet form of petarchan
    three quadrains (groups of lines) first two are in the octave same theme
    third one is in the sestet different theme
    them a concluding couplet (two lines)
    i think its
    abab, cdcd, ebeb,ff

    so its something like this
    a--
    b :---------
    a :Quadrain:
    b-- :Octave
    c-- :
    d :Quadrain:
    c :---------
    d--

    e--
    b :---------
    e :Quadrain:
    b-- :Sestet
    f-|couplet :
    f-|----------
    Last edited by Niamh; 05-10-2007 at 07:58 AM.
    "Come away O human child!To the waters of the wild, With a faery hand in hand, For the worlds more full of weeping than you can understand."
    W.B.Yeats

    "If it looks like a Dwarf and smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf (or a latrine wearing dungarees)"
    Artemins Fowl and the Lost Colony by Eoin Colfer


    my poems-please comment Forum Rules

  3. #78
    Registered User the silent x's Avatar
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    ok, thanks, i may not be able to get this form down, but i'll try
    life philosophy: "if one wants to succeed, they must become independent, if one wants to be independent, one must strive past the dificulties, using them to shape future desicions, like a sword being folded, every fold is a hardship overcome, and every fold removes one more imperfection that would destroy the completed version"

    # of 1st Dans, Black Belts achieved- 2 (1 Hapkido, Sun Moo Kwan), (1 Tae Kwon Do)

  4. #79
    Ditsy Pixie Niamh's Avatar
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    Any takers? Anyone willing to try?
    "Come away O human child!To the waters of the wild, With a faery hand in hand, For the worlds more full of weeping than you can understand."
    W.B.Yeats

    "If it looks like a Dwarf and smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf (or a latrine wearing dungarees)"
    Artemins Fowl and the Lost Colony by Eoin Colfer


    my poems-please comment Forum Rules

  5. #80
    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
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    Exclamation

    Good gobbledy-goo! Tell me I am not the only entry! Come on, somebody can beat me! You get in here and try before I withdraw my entry! This is competition! Come on, write!
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  6. #81
    Ditsy Pixie Niamh's Avatar
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    Adol also entered, so i've got two entries. Sorry pen i think i killed the thread. Maybe if someone else wants to take over and suggest a better form we might get the ball rolling again....
    "Come away O human child!To the waters of the wild, With a faery hand in hand, For the worlds more full of weeping than you can understand."
    W.B.Yeats

    "If it looks like a Dwarf and smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf (or a latrine wearing dungarees)"
    Artemins Fowl and the Lost Colony by Eoin Colfer


    my poems-please comment Forum Rules

  7. #82
    in angulo cum libro Petrarch's Love's Avatar
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    You haven't killed the thread, Niamh. There are two weeks left to submit and people may just be busy. Anyway, here's my two cents:

    Scene in a Home

    Still life of a bowl of fruit and flowers
    Painted on a summer’s day and filled with light,
    The ticking clock telling the steady hours
    As glowing dawn replaces the dark night,
    A vase of spring’s first yellow daffodils,
    An open book with half yet to be read,
    The whisper breeze crossing the windowsill,
    The gentle hand that strokes the resting head.

    Deathbed where the hand grasps the sheets
    With near skeletal frailty and the ear
    Closes to the sound of the clock’s steady beat;
    Eye closes to the memory from past years
    Of little things enjoyed while she, in quiet hours,
    Painted the still life of a bowl of fruit and flowers.

    "In rime sparse il suono/ di quei sospiri ond' io nudriva 'l core/ in sul mio primo giovenile errore"~ Francesco Petrarca
    "Follies and nonsense, whims and inconsistencies do divert me, I own, and I laugh at them whenever I can."~ Jane Austen

  8. #83
    Vincit Qui Se Vincit Virgil's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Niamh View Post
    Adol also entered, so i've got two entries. Sorry pen i think i killed the thread. Maybe if someone else wants to take over and suggest a better form we might get the ball rolling again....
    No you didn't kill it. I'm sorry Niamh. I've been partly preoccupied and partly uninspired lately. If I got two weeks left I will try to submit something.
    LET THERE BE LIGHT

    "Love follows knowledge." – St. Catherine of Siena

    My literature blog: http://ashesfromburntroses.blogspot.com/

  9. #84
    A ist der Affe NickAdams's Avatar
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    I'm in. Let me see what I can do. Please tell me if I make a mistake.

    "Do you mind if I reel in this fish?" - Dale Harris

    "For sale: baby shoes, never worn." - Ernest Hemingway


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  10. #85
    A ist der Affe NickAdams's Avatar
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    What love! Husband and wife for oaths exchanged;
    Their garden sowed with faith
    Her labor inherits father's name
    In a chapel where she waits.

    Can not an orbit cease,
    nor a reaping be delayed?
    At the withering of leaves,
    spring and fall are weighed.

    What lust! A farmer this mistress made.
    More acres to invest,
    so depletes the pond within barren land.

    The length of one, should a garden lay.
    Safe from vermin; safe from pest.
    Unexplored and undiscovered.
    Last edited by NickAdams; 05-16-2007 at 01:09 AM.

    "Do you mind if I reel in this fish?" - Dale Harris

    "For sale: baby shoes, never worn." - Ernest Hemingway


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  11. #86
    Ditsy Pixie Niamh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Petrarch's Love View Post
    You haven't killed the thread, Niamh. There are two weeks left to submit and people may just be busy. Anyway, here's my two cents:

    Scene in a Home

    Still life of a bowl of fruit and flowers
    Painted on a summer’s day and filled with light,
    The ticking clock telling the steady hours
    As glowing dawn replaces the dark night,
    A vase of spring’s first yellow daffodils,
    An open book with half yet to be read,
    The whisper breeze crossing the windowsill,
    The gentle hand that strokes the resting head.

    Deathbed where the hand grasps the sheets
    With near skeletal frailty and the ear
    Closes to the sound of the clock’s steady beat;
    Eye closes to the memory from past years
    Of little things enjoyed while she, in quiet hours,
    Painted the still life of a bowl of fruit and flowers.
    Wow! well done petrarch!
    Quote Originally Posted by NickAdams View Post
    What love! Husband and wife for oaths exchanged;
    Their garden sowed with faith
    Her labor inherits father's name
    In a chapel where she waits.

    Can not an orbit cease,
    nor a reaping be delayed?
    At the withering of leaves,
    spring and fall are weighed.

    What lust! A farmer this mistress made.
    More acres to invest,
    so depletes the pond within barren land.

    The length of one, should a garden lay.
    Safe from vermin; safe from pest.
    Unexplored and undiscovered.
    nick yours is a nice poem but the layout is wrong. Have a look at the other entrants and the explaination of the form. Needs restructuring.
    "Come away O human child!To the waters of the wild, With a faery hand in hand, For the worlds more full of weeping than you can understand."
    W.B.Yeats

    "If it looks like a Dwarf and smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf (or a latrine wearing dungarees)"
    Artemins Fowl and the Lost Colony by Eoin Colfer


    my poems-please comment Forum Rules

  12. #87
    Ditsy Pixie Niamh's Avatar
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    ten days left for entries! hope more of you accept the challenge!
    "Come away O human child!To the waters of the wild, With a faery hand in hand, For the worlds more full of weeping than you can understand."
    W.B.Yeats

    "If it looks like a Dwarf and smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf (or a latrine wearing dungarees)"
    Artemins Fowl and the Lost Colony by Eoin Colfer


    my poems-please comment Forum Rules

  13. #88
    Ditsy Pixie Niamh's Avatar
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    Only seven days left for entries!
    "Come away O human child!To the waters of the wild, With a faery hand in hand, For the worlds more full of weeping than you can understand."
    W.B.Yeats

    "If it looks like a Dwarf and smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf (or a latrine wearing dungarees)"
    Artemins Fowl and the Lost Colony by Eoin Colfer


    my poems-please comment Forum Rules

  14. #89
    Registered User SteveH's Avatar
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    On William Dyce's 'Pegwell Bay, a recollection of October 5th, 1858'

    Autumn and Evening make a double ending.
    The parchment sky's reflected in the sea.
    Two women, both collecting shells, are bending
    To look at one. A third waits patiently.
    A child who holds a spade is gazing at
    Some distant scene or object off the land.
    Remoter figures walk across the flat
    And rock-strewn beach, or, like the donkeys, stand.

    Donati's comet's faintly seen above
    The fossil-laden cliffs, whose strata seem
    To show, more clearly than a book could prove,
    The scale of evolutionary time.
    New knowledge strains old certainties. The child
    Is looking, maybe, at a coming world.


    I wrote this in 1996. I'll try writing a sonnet or other poem specially for future competitions, but I haven't actually written any poems for a year or two - I really ought to get back into the habit.

    Donati's comet was visible in October 1858, and in the full-size painting is faintly visible in the sky above the cliffs, but you can't make it out in my linked reproduction, unfortunately, so you'll have to take my word for it!

    I've got plenty of other Petrarchan/Shakespearean hybrids: is it done to submit more than one poem to these competitions? (I wouldn't go too mad, of course.)

  15. #90
    Registered User SteveH's Avatar
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    'Scene in a Home' by P.L. (above) is excellent and rather moving. I like the way it comes full circle in a somewhat darker mode from how it started, and the volta is spot-on.

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