Form Poem Contest

[Niamh]

I’m sorry Niamh. I am not well acquainted with both the Petrarchan (never even heard of it) or Shakespearian styles but I will try my best to write a poem which conveys a similar style (in rhyme, stanza length and syllables) to the one you have quoted. (I think your quoted poem sounds lovely )

Black Streets Stalk Peter

In the celerity of sunset’s death,
Young Adam flips stones ‘till the pit-pit-patter,
echos beyond stillness of moonlight’s breath,
and makes the milky, white dots supremely fatter.
Young Ike wants wings to transcend the moon
But dreams don’t grow on blackened roots for flight.
His low muttering provides somber tune
as shiftless feet glide mossy stones of night

Peter’s clamor breaks the liquified calms,
as improvisational crows chase his feet.
The sleepers are too tired to have qualms,
so High Pitch River floods the street.
He turns lanes, hits a pole, streaking scarlet
It might've been worse if he had struck a harlot

Actually Adol what you did was a Miltonic and Shakespearian sonnet Which is fine, I'll accept that. As a Miltonic is a slightly modified Petrarchan sonnet.
I think its a wonderful Poem, but your last two lines need to conclude the intire poem as opposed to just the last quatrain. Weldone! (although your last two lines had me in stitches!)

[Pendragon]

Sonnet For the Ripper

In Whitechapel darkness a shadow would slink,
Who must have been able to pass as a toff;
Searching for fallen angels who had too much to drink—
Then out came the sharp blades as he sliced this or that off.
Some give the number of victims as low as just four,
While others claim as many as a dozen or so—
Cut down in the darkness, dissected, the blood gushing poured,
But the identity of Jack the Ripper is something no one knows—

Drop off another dispatch to the old post, now me luv—
Written in red ink since the proper red stuff has congealed!
Hee-hee! Bet I give the Inspector the fits with this stuff!
Could he but read between the lines, what secrets would be revealed!
But come now, Mary, don’t rise, stay flat off your back:
As you must! Hee-hee! Here’s a toast to saucy old Jack!

Pendragon
© 4/30/07

[Niamh]

Sonnet For the Ripper

In Whitechapel darkness a shadow would slink,
Who must have been able to pass as a toff;
Searching for fallen angels who had too much to drink—
Then out came the sharp blades as he sliced this or that off.
Some give the number of victims as low as just four,
While others claim as many as a dozen or so—
Cut down in the darkness, dissected, the blood gushing poured,
But the identity of Jack the Ripper is something no one knows—

Drop off another dispatch to the old post, now me luv—
Written in red ink since the proper red stuff has congealed!
Hee-hee! Bet I give the Inspector the fits with this stuff!
Could he but read between the lines, what secrets would be revealed!
But come now, Mary, don’t rise, stay flat off your back:
As you must! Hee-hee! Here’s a toast to saucy old Jack!

Pendragon
© 4/30/07

Weldone Pen! You handled the form well!

[Petrarch's Love]

Niamh--I'm a tad confused. The poem you posted just looks like a Shakespearean sonnet to me, apart from the fact that it's formated on the page into eight and six lines. Are you saying the Petrarchan part is just that the volta occurs after the eighth line, or am I missing something?

[Niamh]

Well usually a petrarchan is one octave split into two quadrains and one sestet that contains 'info' in the first three lines and conludes in the last three. both the octave and the sestet deal with different thoughts or issues of the poems subject. With a shakespearian the sonnet is separated into three quadrains and one concluding couplet. Each quadrain deals with somethoughs and the couplet concludes the poem.
In the peom i posted the Poet Patrick Kavanagh has laid out the poem in the octave and sestet form of the petrarchan, one issue in one and another in the other. But He also splits it up into the quadrains and couplet of a shakespearian. so instead of there being 'three forms of thought' there are only two and then it is concluded.
does that make any sense?

[Petrarch's Love]

Yes, actually I'm very familiar with both forms. I was confused by what you meant because technically the Kavanagh poem is really a quatrain and couplet at the end, which isn't really a sestet in the traditional sense. Also, it isn't at all unusual for there to be a shift in idea after the second quatrain in a Shakespearean sonnet (this shift is usually referred to as the turn, or the volta). However, placing the volta after the eight line and formatting the poem on the page in this way are doubtless part of the Petrarchan influence on the Shakespearean form, so I see what you mean. I was just unsure as to whether there was somthing else Petrarchan about it that I wasn't seeing. Sorry about the nitpicking (blame the professor in me). I'll hush up now and go write some poetry.

[Niamh]

Yes, actually I'm very familiar with both forms. I was confused by what you meant because technically the Kavanagh poem is really a quatrain and couplet at the end, which isn't really a sestet in the traditional sense. Also, it isn't at all unusual for there to be a shift in idea after the second quatrain in a Shakespearean sonnet (this shift is usually referred to as the turn, or the volta). However, placing the volta after the eight line and formatting the poem on the page in this way are doubtless part of the Petrarchan influence on the Shakespearean form, so I see what you mean. I was just unsure as to whether there was somthing else Petrarchan about it that I wasn't seeing. Sorry about the nitpicking (blame the professor in me). I'll hush up now and go write some poetry.

when i was writing the last post i kept on forgetting terminologies. But i hope you understand what i meant. I had to study this poem in depth for my leaving certificate seven years ago and my teacher went into a lot af detail about this sonnet and its use of two forms.

[Petrarch's Love]

when i was writing the last post i kept on forgetting terminologies. But i hope you understand what i meant. I had to study this poem in depth for my leaving certificate seven years ago and my teacher went into a lot af detail about this sonnet and its use of two forms.

No worries. I think we're all clear. The Kavanagh must have been fun to look at in depth. It's a wonderful poem.

[Niamh]

Are you going to try the form Petrarch now that you get the gist?

[Petrarch's Love]

Yes indeed, but I've got to slog through some student papers first.

[Niamh]

cant wait to read your contrabution!

[Niamh]

So anyone else going to write a poem in the form? any takers? or have i somewhat killed the thread?

[Il Penseroso]

It is a hard one, for me any rhyme scheme is. I'll try though, when I get some free time. Good choice.

[Petrarch's Love]

No, you haven't killed the thread Niamh. We're just all busy thinking, and we've got until the 29th right?

[Niamh]

Yep. you all have till the 29th.
Goodluck everyone. Hope i havent made things too difficult for you all by choosing this one!