Okay, here are two different parts out of the story i am writing. It still will have all kinds of nonsense like i usually write, it just makes a tiny bit more sense, with somewhat of a plot to it. critique it, say whatever, I just need feedback... give me ideas... please at least read it though. There may be some problems for people that don't like vulgar language, but there is not that much of it. okay here it is, just remember.... these are just two different parts of it taken out of random places, and i know there are mistakes.
George, a citizen of Glenvale, was sleeping when he heard the first thud hit his window. He got up and grabbed his baseball bat to beat the crap out of those damn kids that were stupid enough to throw some thing at his window and that were always harassing him. When he opened his door, he looked around and saw smoke and fire raging in the city. And then he saw the monkeys. There were about 16 of them and they were flinging poo all over. What the hell is going on here? He thought. Please let this just be a bad acid trip. Then he realized that he had not been on acid since that time in Ireland with the Jewish hooker, but that is another story to be told another time. Just then a hot, steamy glob of carp flew right into his face. He screamed, and starting scratching at his face, trying to get it out of his eyes. He toppled backwards into his pool, and was tore to pieces and eaten by the crocodile that had been waiting there
* * *
Greg was a bum, and he lived in the Glenvale water tower. And what a life it was. He had everything that he could possibly need; he had water, obviously, and for food, well there was as many rats in there as you needed to eat a day. When he needed to take a leak, or a dump, the water tower was a large toilet. Yes, he was living the life, for as far as being a bum goes. Greg was feeling pretty good as he went outside to look at the stars. He was amazed at what he saw when he walked out. His first thoughts were that a terrorist had attacked. There were helicopters swarming everywhere and there was a scent of smoke in the air. When he looked down upon the town, he gaped in terror at what he was seeing. There were buildings on fire, smoke everywhere, cars were being tipped over, broken glass everywhere, and people were out in the streets in their pajamas screaming for help. It truly looked like a full scale riot had broken out. Where the hell are the cops, he thought. Actually screw the cops, where the **** are the SWAT teams? But the truly horrifying part about what George was seeing was what was causing the chaos. Animals, every kind of animal imaginable, were destroying everything they came in contact with. It was truly a sight to be seen.