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Thread: me, my rose and a dog

  1. #1
    king of concrete jungle dreamsbegone's Avatar
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    me, my rose and a dog

    i woke up by the dawn
    to behold the horses of the sun
    jumping to work
    but still it was dark
    and still the shadow of the night
    cover'd the horizon
    i was cold ,empty and alone
    i wished for a smile
    to break the silence of the night
    i wished for a laughter
    to bring the joy of the morn
    but it was me, my rose and a dog
    who only passed the street in seek of home
    despair was on my face
    the wish of sleep was out of hands
    in the few seconds of it all
    the sun began to raise
    the moon hath stepp'd way
    to let the throne be taken
    by the kingdom of the sun
    so hath stars stepp'd away
    to leave their work for their master
    on it went from its place
    the sun was half awake
    and the morning marks were in space
    smile and laughter were heared again
    out,out, brief candle.
    life is but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage. and then is heared nomore, it is a tale told by an idiot full of sound and fury. a signifying nothing.


    "judge a man by his questions rather than his answers"
    Voltaire

  2. #2
    Vincit Qui Se Vincit Virgil's Avatar
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    Hi dreamsbegone. I just noticed you're from Iraq. So I assume english is not your first language. I liked your poem. It had some really good parts. Great imagery here: "behold the horses of the sun / jumping to work". And this was very beautiful: "but it was me, my rose and a dog" Anyone that brings a dog into a poem warms my heart.

    Your english was off in a couple of spots, though. For instance: "in seek of home;" you mean, in search of home.

    Goodness, I hope your country can find the peace and optimism of your pretty poem.
    LET THERE BE LIGHT

    "Love follows knowledge." St. Catherine of Siena

    My literature blog: http://ashesfromburntroses.blogspot.com/

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