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Thread: Funniest quotes

  1. #1
    Monarch of Holy Imperium Levenbreech Vor's Avatar
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    Funniest quotes

    Who do you guys think has the funniest quotes.

    I'd vote for Douglas Adams.
    I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.

    Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear - From Frank Herbert's Dune Book Series

  2. #2
    The Voices In Your Head Reichenbach's Avatar
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    I'd second that, if you want some really cool quotes check out this site, it's great . . . www.mytheme.com

  3. #3
    Dorothy Parker. When she was informed that former President Calvin Coolidge had just died, she quipped: "How could they tell?"

    I also love the wit of Oscar Wilde and Mark Twain.

    Wilde: "A good friend stabs you in the front."

    Twain: "Whenever I get the urge for strenuous exercise, I lay down until the feeling goes away."

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    precious... subterranean's Avatar
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    What did he say anway?

    Quote Originally Posted by Levenbreech Vor
    Who do you guys think has the funniest quotes.

    I'd vote for Douglas Adams.


    "there are people in the world so hungry that God can not appear to them except in the form of bread"

    Mahatma Gandhi

  5. #5
    Monarch of Holy Imperium Levenbreech Vor's Avatar
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    I second Mark Twain, he is really funny.

    Also Woody Allen is way up there on my "funny quote ladder"


    Levenbreech Vor
    I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.

    Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear - From Frank Herbert's Dune Book Series

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    Will Rogers: Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggie" untill you find a rock.

    "An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you just found out."

    "Rome collapsed because it had a Senate,now whats going to happen to us with a Senate and a House."

  7. #7
    In a rainbow. Mortis Anarchy's Avatar
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    "A zebra does not change spots!"
    -Al Gore

    "OBGYN's out there that can't practice, their, their love with women!"
    -W. Bush

    "I think that gay marriage should be between a man and a woman."
    -Arnie

    "Thats a good looking mummy! If I were single I would ask that mummy out on a date"
    -Clinton

    Good times. I just watched a show on the stupidest/funniest quotes ever said.

  8. #8
    Just another nerd RobinHood3000's Avatar
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    Twain, Wilde, and Churchill - the quotation trifecta.
    Por una cabeza
    Si ella me olvida
    Qué importa perderme
    Mil veces la vida
    Para qué vivir

  9. #9
    In a rainbow. Mortis Anarchy's Avatar
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    I agree...Wilde has some of the best quotes ever!

  10. #10
    androcles
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    "Then let them execute me in my absence"

    Brendan Behan, on being informed that the I.R.A. had sentenced him to death in his absence.

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    I absolutely adore Oscar Wilde; I find him very funny.

    I don't really have a quote that I find the most comical, but for some reason I laughed so hard when a character in The Thee Musketeers said, "Ah! You have killed me!"

  12. #12
    Registered User mmaria's Avatar
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    Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love. (Einstein)
    Love doesn't make the world go round,
    love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

  13. #13
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    "I am nobody
    Nobody is perfect
    Therefore, I must be perfect!"
    - Anon

    This guy - Anon - well he wins hands down everytime if you ask me!!! He says alot of quirky things throughout the ages....

  14. #14
    spiritus ubi vult spirat weltanschauung's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Levenbreech Vor View Post
    I second Mark Twain, he is really funny.

    Also Woody Allen is way up there on my "funny quote ladder"


    Levenbreech Vor
    I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.



    Quote Originally Posted by Sparrow View Post
    I absolutely adore Oscar Wilde; I find him very funny.
    I do not play cricket because it requires me to assume such indecent postures.
    Last edited by weltanschauung; 12-22-2008 at 12:27 PM.

  15. #15
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    OSCAR WILDE (fall on your knees....worship the god)
    WOODY ALLEN
    Here's a genius neglected on this thread-WODEHOUSE, his dialogue is embellished with hysteria-inducing gems.

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