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Thread: Impossible Songs for a Fart Machine (Poems by Wolf Larsen)

  1. #196
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Warning: Do NOT read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious.

    My Balls Care About Correct English Grammar!
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    Suddenly, I start barfing capital letters everywhere
    Meanwhile, incorrect spelling keeps jumping out of my butt
    My grammar teacher is whipping & whipping me as she pees on me
    Please, more!
    While a bunch of conjunctions begin swimming out of my penis
    All the conjunctions begin devouring the body of Aristotle
    While Aristotle screams a bunch of run-on sentences
    And the Queen starts giving Aristotle a blow job in perfect English
    And Shakespeare who’s been watching & masturbating
    Ejaculates a bunch of Old English spellings
    All over the earth or is it Earth?
    Because My Balls really care!

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  2. #197
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    oops!
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  3. #198
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    A Jewish Thor Named Wolf Larsen
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    Thousands of skies and phrases of poetry dash & fly & sing around each other
    As you smash a beer bottle over the head of the poem
    And the poem bleeds blood & words & violence
    As you piss your toxic masculinity all over the liberal aristocracy
    And then you jump up into the thunderclouds
    And you raise your electric hands
    And you crash lightning into everyone’s minds
    And everyone’s minds are flying through millions of years & solar systems

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen

    Wolf Larsen performs his poetry, plays, & novels on YouTube:

    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  4. #199
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Your Fellow Man is Delicious!
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    My hands smell like your death
    Your blood all over the walls is poetry
    I’m chopping up your corpse like an artist
    As your flesh simmers over the fire
    I masturbate to the beat of a thousand angry symphonies
    The aroma of your cooking flesh carries the language of happiness to my nostrils
    As I cook you your eyeballs on the counter
    Watch me with a most peculiar stare
    And now your eyeballs watch me eat you

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  5. #200
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Eight Thousand Orgasms a Day
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    All of history jumps off the page and crashes into the reader’s face
    The reader’s face splinters up into a Cubist sculpture
    Then the reader’s mouth recites graffiti-art-murals for the next thousand years
    And for the next thousand years the human race dances to the zigzagging-crashing-letters of graffiti-art-murals
    Until the ending of the poem eats through the reader’s face

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  6. #201
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Warning: Do NOT read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious.

    The Grand Canyon is a Giant Vagina!
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    A poem is percolating in the balls of the human race
    And dragonflies with human faces
    Are rolling up-&-down and around
    As the flying-talking-nipples
    Are singing jazz scat
    As Greek gods smear the poetry of spermatozoa all over the bathhouse walls
    And then big-bouncing-buttocks go bouncing boing-boing down Bootylicious Avenue
    And the trumpet farts a bunch of political speeches
    While the liberals & conservatives scream a bunch of capitalist diarrhea at each other
    And then the poem SPLATS into your face
    And you wipe the gooey messy poetry off your face

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  7. #202
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Warning: Do NOT read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious.

    My English Teacher Sucking My Dick
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    A colon & a semi-colon were in bed makin’ incorrect English grammar together
    Hubba-hubba!
    And a bunch of silent “E’s” were rioting on Capitol Hill together
    And a sentence fragment was pissing on somebody’s Mercedes-Benz
    ‘Cause there’s hardly no public toilets nowhere
    Meanwhile a run-on sentence was flooding everywhere and causing mass destruction
    And Wolf Larsen was ****ing the English language up the ***
    But you can’t begin a sentence with a big butt
    But my give-a-**** left me for another man

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    Last edited by WolfLarsen; 08-30-2021 at 03:59 PM.
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  8. #203
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Warning: Do NOT read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious.

    Cumming This Thursday! World-Wide Orgies!
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    I slash you with the violin
    The cello goes for a walk through your vagina and up the Suez Canal and further up to the moon
    The clarinet is doing something with his penis
    The drums are keeping time of electing a capitalist bozo every 4 years
    The violent cries
    The trumpet then bongs the bweep with a bunch of bop
    A Poet begins making love to the cello
    Then God’s erection crashes into the Earth
    And everybody dies

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen

    Wolf Larsen performs his poetry, plays, & novels on YouTube:

    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  9. #204
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Warning: Do NOT read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious.

    Sitting By a River of Fire
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    I’m creating the New York City skyline with 1000 giant castrated penises
    When suddenly giant talking buttocks appeared everywhere
    This caused a million years of television commercials to run amok
    And a dozen moons suddenly appeared in the night sky
    And now everyone is ripping their clothes off and screaming obscene nursery rhymes at each other
    And waterfalls of knowledge are falling out of everyone’s heads
    After that everyone in Brooklyn takes the train to Antarctica
    And the streets of Brooklyn have been filled with insane-babbling-zombies ever since

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  10. #205
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Warning: Do NOT read this if you have a problem with obscenity.

    A Canvas of Spermatozoa
    a poem by Wolf Larsen

    Everything in the world is dripping with me
    Because My Penis is a god!
    With my appraised arms I summon up hell to the surface of the Earth
    And now there’s thousands of devils with red phalluses ejaculating poetry everywhere
    And now in all the Temples of Sin the human race begins creating a sensual poetry
    That splashes from the planet Earth and floods the entire universe

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  11. #206
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    A Big Wrecking Ball With Nipples All Over It!
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    I demand a new language!
    Tits & penises & buttocks will all be letters in this new language!
    And every day we will blow up language with a bazooka and create new languages!
    New languages of space-alien-gobbledygook jumping out of dildo machines!
    Give the Queen of England lots of drugs and let’s have a new Queen’s English!
    Let us have porn actors & actresses recite Shakespearean dialogue while they do the ooh!-ooh!-ooh!
    A new language now!

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  12. #207
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Warning: Do NOT read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious.

    Gloria Steinem & Jerry Falwell in a 69 Together
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    Suddenly humongous breasts grow out of all the buildings
    And millions of Ronald McDonald clones are operating all the nipple machines
    That are sending flying vaginas out into the universe
    And on whatever planet a flying vagina lands
    Human civilization grows like a yeast infection
    And suddenly the yeast infection of human civilization has spread throughout the universe

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  13. #208
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    I’m Somebody Else!
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    SPLAT! BLUP! SCHMIPPEEEEEE!
    What is the wrong of the up?
    How blam-blam-blam is all the everything?
    Are we schizophrenic blabbering manikins?
    Or are we the zookeepers of endless Armageddons?
    It’s time to skateboard into hundreds of tornadoes!
    No it isn’t!
    Have you danced to the beginning of time yet?
    The cavemen are here!
    Let’s do some Neanderthal spaceship dance!
    Ready?

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen

    Wolf Larsen performs his poetry, plays, & novels on YouTube:

    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  14. #209
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    Warning: Do NOT read this if you have a problem with obscenity, or if you are very religious.

    The Orgies of a New Religion
    A poem by Wolf Larsen

    There is no god but Wolf Larsen!
    All the spermatozoa in my ballsack are my angels!
    I demand cathedrals of human skulls be built in my honor!
    On Sundays orgies of endless sex shall be held in my honor!
    I demand the drinking of human blood in rituals of joy!
    We shall fornicate with animals under a howling moon!
    Insanity shall be considered a blessing!
    Now let the human race disrobe and dance naked on all the planets!

    Copyright 2021 by Wolf Larsen
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

  15. #210
    The Wolf of Larsen WolfLarsen's Avatar
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    The poems on this thread will be self-published as a book of poetry under the title: "Impossible Songs for a Fart Machine"
    "...the ramblings of a narcissistic, self-obsessed, deranged mind."
    My poetry, plays, novels, & other stuff on Amazon:
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_athr...or=Wolf Larsen

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