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Thread: If it be time

  1. #1
    Miaaow! Twota's Avatar
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    If it be time

    If it be time to go back,
    Let me paint my eyes and nails black--
    Let me cover my skin in ink and colors:
    Of cats, birds, words, and flowers.

    If it be time to leave this all behind,
    Let me drain the residue of my mind,
    Interpolate my letters and dashes,
    Rearrange my books and my eyelashes.

    If it be time to die--
    Bear with me this brief goodbye.

  2. #2
    Registered User tailor STATELY's Avatar
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    Love this. I might be tempted to finish with "If it be time to die--" reversing the order of the last two lines, or deleting "Bear with me..." altogether.

    Sincerely,

    Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
    tailor
    tailor

    who am I but a stitch in time
    what if I were to bare my soul
    would you see me origami

    7-8-2015

  3. #3
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    I agree. I like the shift between going back and leaving behind. Very well done and left me pleasantly dizzy.
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  4. #4
    Miaaow! Twota's Avatar
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    Thank you, Taylor and Delta! I am glad you enjoyed it. I think I will also follow what you said in regards to omitting that last line. It does read better without it.

    I can't find the Edit Post option available on the first post in the thread. Is that normal? xD
    Last edited by Twota; 05-23-2020 at 04:19 PM.

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