Excellent analysis of the hours I have spent on here over the last 3 years. Your work here is now complete - I'll leave you to show everyone how it should be done.
H
Type: Posts; User: hillwalker; Keyword(s):
Excellent analysis of the hours I have spent on here over the last 3 years. Your work here is now complete - I'll leave you to show everyone how it should be done.
H
I'll pass since my feedback is not worth the screen space it's written on.
H
Over to you Nick - I'm done with communicating through your editor.
H
It's not good etiquette to critique other members' feedback unless it's in response to your own posting. Even then it can seem overly defensive.
We all have an opinion, and you should have the...
Absolutely correct. I don't have an aversion to rhyme. I have written several poems that rhyme - and posted them on here.
What I have an aversion to is bad rhyme - and forced rhyme where syntax is...
Ok - I give in. Rhyme is sublime. I wish you all the best on those other sites where your skills are better appreciated.
I'll not waste my time reading or commenting on any more of your poetry....
I'm not sure I should play along.
But, what the hell - I quite enjoyed reading parts of this. It certainly keeps us on our toes. But you still need to trim your descriptions. Ask yourself what...
Thank goodness this isn't a 'scholarly literature site' in that case. These are unreadable, so your request 'don't read my poems' will at least be cheerfully met.
I also have yet to see (m)any...
http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/spick-and-span.html
Whether or not I approve of your writing, the opinion of an independent reader is presumably what you were seeking when you posted your story...
You're a capable writer, and parts of this worked well. You also have a poetic turn of phrase when necessary without over-writing.
A couple of spots though -
everything looked spic-and-span...
I'll not go through the grammar point by point - missing apostrophes (the drunk's back'), spelling mistakes ('too' for 'to' and 'loosing' for 'losing') and sentences linked by commas when a full stop...
That makes it clear as mud.
The possibility of it being misread as a question was never an issue.
Who's and Whose are two totally different words as I'm sure you already know.
H
Hilarious.
The subject of your sentence is the sun's rays - they are blighting the tawny shadow. That's how most people would read it the way it's written here.
If you meant that the tawny...
First of all - no one can teach you to write stories. They can teach you to improve your grammar and writing style and how to avoid the traps many aspiring writers fall into. But you have to have a...
Brilliant! That's the best analogy I have ever read of how a story should start.
If every aspiring writer got to read this there would be less stories concerned with the main character waking up...
I don't hate you - I just don't understand how you can compare this to Shakespeare. . . just because it's written in the form of a drama rather than as a short story.
If you're looking for...
If you reformatted this it would be prose. Poetry isn't just a matter of breaking up sentences and paragraphs into the shape of a poem.
H
'a bit of Shakespeare style of writing'? You're taking the p1ss, surely. It's like something conjured up for a video-game.
H
I'm assuming this is meant to be a script. So not my cup of tea.
Fan Art? I've no idea where you got that idea from. This is where most members post their short stories.
H
Of course it's a personal opinion - like every opinion anyone else will give you. But I read a great deal and know what works for most writers - and what doesn't. So many writers misuse prologues the...
Unusual for the OP to critique his own piece - it's great that you enjoyed it.
As for the amount of effort it took you to write - you're obviously winding us up.
quiet (?) effective and...
You ask elsewhere if there are good and bad ways to introduce a story. I would consider a Prologue to be one of the worst ways - it's usually a means of dumping background story onto the reader and...
Indeed - since there's not a queue of readers waiting to offer you their feedback.
Welcome to LitNet by the way - I wonder how we survived before you washed up on these shores.
H
How to kill a poem's spirit with ineffectual rhyme Lesson #1 - use the same end-rhyme 16 times in one poem.
H
Except no one will get as far as lines (verse?) 14 + 15 because you have already suffocated us with your self-indulgent display of erudition. . . your sarcasm isn't too hot either.
H