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Thanks for the read(s) Starr. I am delighted that you took time to read and to make such kind comments. I have had nothing published as I am a very undisciplined writer and only scribble...

Thank you for the kind compliment, Ceicil and I am sure that your writing will be of a high standard.

LL

Thank you blp. I get your point about some allusions leading nowhere but I intended this as a fairly short piece and so not everything could be elaborated upon. Glad you liked it and good of you to...

Thanks again, Katie. There are a few more stories about if you scroll down the board, probably on the second or third page by now and some poetry too on the Writing board.

Psyche. Thank you. Kind...

Well thank you, Katie. Good of you to take time to read and comment.
I agree;the intricacies of a child's mind are a wonderful place for writers to mine. These honourable boys managed to learn as...

Thank you Darlin. I appreciate anyone who reads my efforts and am ecstatic when they take time to comment. So forgive the tardiness of this reply. The poem had sunk down to lie amongst the...

Well thank you, Centricity. Seems a few have read and not bothered with a comment - which is fine because sometimes what is on the page fails to move the reader sufficiently to spark a reaction. ...

Thank you, brighttears, glad you enjoyed this. Good of you to take time to read and leave a comment. Much appreciated.

LL

Scan old spaces in the sky
and cool your eyes.
Darkness, natural black,
startles for a moment , until
a star comes bright before us.
Light of stars
contain old glowings;
ancient shinings;...

Thank you, B. Mental. Very grateful for the read, and yes, semaphores seems to be the right word there. Glad you noticed it.


LL

Hungover.
A threatening word.

Hungover what? An abyss seething with liquefied hopes? A chasm cleft between sanity and despair? A void of abandoned aspiration?

A mess of fear; real and...

Been there, done that and it's just as bad as you say it is. All our stories are different; but the same. If you've come to writing it shows some sort of willingness. I'm not saying it will change...

This has some lovely flourishes 'Great looming clouds crept over the sky like guilty things..'. The device of opening with a direct address to the reader sets the tone for this as being polemical...

Thank you Scheherezade. I take your point about maybe expanding the role of Pete's Mum; she is mentioned then sort of ...abandoned. The story is called 'Street Life' and I was trying to paint tiny...

A few changes made. Do they work?

'I feel more than see your work'- you know, BMental, I think that is one of the best compliments I have ever had. There is no need to apologise for managing your time whichever way you see fit; I...

Thanks Darlin. There are couple more lower down which I'd be delighted to have some thoughts on. I see they have had some reads but no comments. I am unsure, still, what the site requires but am...

I'm a novice too, Naegling, and accept the review as true and useful. Sometimes the spell of words runs away with us and sense floats out the window. Your take on this is relevant and accurate and...

Thanks for the kind comments Kal. I don't usually try to write in rhyme but this one seemed to come out that way. I'll be looking out for your work and if you want me to take a look at anything in...

Thanks Samercury. Yeah that old a=b squared never seems to have had much relevance since then. Nice of you to read and comment. If you'd like me to take a look at anything specific I'd be happy...

Thank you, Rosalind. I tried to convey some feelings which are sometimes hard to capture without mawkishness and sentimentality. Glad you felt I have succeeded and really appreciate the time taken...

Thank you, Darlin. I was beginning to wonder if I would ever get anyone to say anything about these little pieces. Very perceptive of you to notice the word 'geek' in there. I did ponder this for...

'Vincey.'

'Paddy.'

'Jimmy.'

'Sean.'

All the way down, until both teams were chosen and the game could begin. The ball belonged to Peter in No. 2 and when he wasn't available we had to ask...

I didn't know the word then,
Now I know that you were - buxom.
Blonde mane loose, those brown clips
Were meant for sisters, spinsters,
Never you.

At seventeen, I know you loved me.
You...

'She used to smile, your Annie. Brung smiles to us that could be doin' with an occasional twinklin' eye.'

Croskery sat with the accustomed halfun in his thick fingers.

'What's that?'

'I...