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  1. Replies
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    Hi Hawk, happy to see you've still got figurative...

    Hi Hawk, happy to see you've still got figurative language washing around in your brain... and I hope you're well, or at least well enough to be happy while providing us with interesting poetry. I...
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    3,312

    Like it! After you've left, it will still be...

    Like it! After you've left, it will still be always be the spot where you sat. Makes me think about Whitman's crowds passing over the Brooklyn Bridge. You are the absence of all of us ... keep...
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    Hi Hawk, just poped by to read your latest. My...

    Hi Hawk, just poped by to read your latest. My favorite line:

    When appetite drives
    we dice with our lives,
    of this you can be quite certain,
    the gaining of weight
    from clearing your plate...
  4. Thread: a new love

    by lallison
    Replies
    7
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    1,215

    it's really outstanding. I'm so happy i had a...

    it's really outstanding. I'm so happy i had a moment to visit. Looks like the writing here is just as fantastic as ever. Keep it up :)
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    Diary: Last Night's Dream

    Last night I dreamt I was hiking along a rocky mountain stream with Mom, Stepdad, and others. Rocks began flying towards us horizontally from up stream. They were like meteorites, but without a...
  6. Thread: Origilallity

    by lallison
    Replies
    16
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    1,757

    Thank you, thank you very much. And now, for my...

    Thank you, thank you very much. And now, for my final number, at the height of my popularity, I would like to dedicate this just for you. And you know who you your are. I call it:

    Song of...
  7. That's right, and I've just spent the last month...

    That's right, and I've just spent the last month observing and demonstrating it. Glad you enjoy Carson McCullers.
  8. Thread: Moving Day

    by lallison
    Replies
    28
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    2,619

    Thanks for that, as I mentioned above: so...

    Thanks for that, as I mentioned above:



    so I really do appreciate critical feedback. Do you feel like the editing is an improvement or has made it worse?

    And for the record, I was only...
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    8,658

    thank you. I worked hard for a many hours...

    thank you. I worked
    hard for a many hours
    reading, rereading,
    studying,
    and revising.

    glad it
    paid
    off.
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    8,658

    No way!

    No way!
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    8,658

    this is such a great poem who could imagine...

    this is such
    a great poem
    who could imagine
    that writing simple
    sentimental sentences

    broken with line breaks
    and stanzas
    could result in
    a work of absolute genius
  12. Thread: Beech Tree

    by lallison
    Replies
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    1,578

    Great depiction of how we become attached to...

    Great depiction of how we become attached to trees. By the end, I could feel a deep sorrow upon seeing it fall. Outstanding use of sound devices.

    This spring, he still stood tall and proud....
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    I think that if you want to be published, reading...

    I think that if you want to be published, reading and understanding contemporary poetry is important. I read a lot of modern poetry, but that's not written in the last 20 years. So I don't know the...
  14. Thread: Stir the Fire

    by lallison
    Replies
    2
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    1,087

    Well, nothing wring with this that a college...

    Well, nothing wring with this that a college level poetry writing course couldn't fix. As it stands, the first stanza is better than the second because it deals with concrete images that bring about...
  15. ha! it's like the emperors new clothes. I get it!

    ha! it's like the emperors new clothes. I get it!
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    2,161

    it's so moving! This is sure to be a classic. I'm...

    it's so moving! This is sure to be a classic. I'm happy to have been able to read this before some fancy publishing company gets hold of it. Glad I was here and one of the first. Congratulations
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    Thanks, I love it. You seriously display poetry...

    Thanks, I love it. You seriously display poetry as an art. Thank you so much for letting us read your work!
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    597

    it amazes me how you can write like this....

    it amazes me how you can write like this. phenomenally thought-provoking! An amazingly multi dimensional poem containing raw emotion that nearly all of us have felt, but so few can express. Thanks so...
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    waxing phylisophical again, PM, I go for...

    waxing phylisophical again, PM, I go for existentialism. Nice thoughts, and well intentioned.
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    An amazingly multi dimensional poem.

    An amazingly multi dimensional poem.
  21. Thread: Moving Day

    by lallison
    Replies
    28
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    2,619

    Thanks for all the great input. I'm still...

    Thanks for all the great input. I'm still continuing to work on this. I typically write in a narrative, story telling style and I'm trying to experiment with some new things. I don't know if it will...
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    Sorry, mate, she probably won't. I try to hide my...

    Sorry, mate, she probably won't. I try to hide my interest in poetry when courting. Better just to throw some money around and take her somewhere trendy. Of course, I always end up with women I don't...
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    normally I would just fill in this box with...

    normally I would just fill in this box with generic laudatory comments when I read a poem like this one, and yet, the depth of its generics borders on masterful. Allow me to try and fill in some of...
  24. Thread: Miscarriage

    by lallison
    Replies
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    1,050

    you have captured the experience perfectly....

    you have captured the experience perfectly. Straight from the heart indeed - love the final pair of lines. Wonderful stuff. As soft and beautiful as ever. This is perfect and whole.
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    Nice title quote. I'm a Rothco fan too. Saw a...

    Nice title quote. I'm a Rothco fan too. Saw a couple of his works last summer at the High Museum in Atlanta.

    So I found your poem and interesting read and worth a reread or two. I liked your use...
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