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"This is the true measure of love: When we believe that we alone can love, that no one could ever have loved so before us, and that no one will ever love in the same way after us”
In spite of knowing Charlotte is already engaged to a man named Albert, who is in fact eleven years her senior, (nothing unusual here) Werther falls in love with her. He believes his love is returned (as it is) but she is engaged to another and, bound by convention, she must marry her betrothed. Love is always blind, and although Werther is young and foolhardy his impetuosity is understandable to any man who has fallen in love madly, truly and deeply. And such Love takes us unawares and overrules restraint and self control. I’ve been there and know how wonderfully Goethe captures such coup de foudre. It is not just tormented young men who become fixated; passionate love can become an obsession at any age.
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Was Wether's suicide an act of honor? I rarely use this word, honor, as it is practically meaningless today. Wether had a profound sense of honor to himself and Lotte. As has been said many times already, Wether was a temperamental fellow, who I think was susceptible to fall into melancholy easier than most. He kept himself happy by reading, thinking, and wandering about the world. He couldn't function as a regular member of society and I believe this bothered him and lead him to fall into a bit of an existential crisis. His life may have lacked meaning after the marriage of Lotte and his failure at a job. What was the purpose of his life?
The relationship between Lotte and Werther was very natural. They complimented each other intellectually and emotionally. They experienced a very strong and deep love that was almost idealistic. Their love grew under hell's comedy; they lived and loved in the garden of their imaginations, but the eminence of reality gave finality to their fantasy. Werther, however, continued to grow in love as Lotte moved toward her duty as a wife to another. He asked and took so little from her and it was enough for a time just to be with her in any capacity. His love for her was beautiful and very rare. This selflessness moved me profoundly.
I believe that in the case of Wether's decision to commit suicide a portion of his decision was influenced from his sense of honor for himself and for Lotte. He knew he was causing her great pain and she was very clear about her boundaries. He could not accept this and turned toward despair as he honored the integrity of his principles. He loved her so much and felt such despair toward his own existence that he saw no other way to resolve this inner conflict except through his own death.