A Young Eye

1,2,1,2. 1,1,3?
we are taking off to place called lies,
where everyone talks in multiple styles.
Buying clothes to match their masks,
subscribing to unless and cruel tasks.
With each word a drop to the poison vile.
Alright folks, temperature’s hot,
your pilot has been long bought.
Stay calm and in your seat,
we hope you play the rules and keep neat.
Just another mile.
Be sure to say your last prayer
the governments will coat it with another layer.
We welcome you to the land of the cursed,
where you will soon stop, drop, and burst

Another attempt at poetry wrecked by the rhyme scheme - hardly any of the lines make sense.
Poetry doesn't have to rhyme. Write what you feel - not what a rhyming dictionary forces you to.

You might also consider reading the guidelines to posting work on this board - one new post per day to allow others' work to be read and commented on before it disappears off the bottom of the page,

H

Quote:

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Originally Posted by 2X2E5

1,2,1,2. 1,1,3?
we are taking off to place called lies,
where everyone talks in multiple styles.
Buying clothes to match their masks,
subscribing to unless and cruel tasks.
With each word a drop to the poison vile.
Alright folks, temperature’s hot,
your pilot has been long bought.
Stay calm and in your seat,
we hope you play the rules and keep neat.
Just another mile.
Be sure to say your last prayer
the governments will coat it with another layer.
We welcome you to the land of the cursed,
where you will soon stop, drop, and burst

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Haha whatever happened to the last 2?
I liked these lines very much:

we are taking off to place called lies,
where everyone talks in multiple styles.
Buying clothes to match their masks,
subscribing to unless and cruel tasks.
With each word a drop to the poison vile.

and the last two lines too:

We welcome you to the land of the cursed,
where you will soon stop, drop, and burst :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by cacian

Haha whatever happened to the last 2?

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The part you said about the last 2, is that meant to be philosophical? Cause I'm struggling to understand why another number is needed the last two days haha