Just For Him

A man slowly makes his way towards the top of a long steep hill, alone. Fiery leaves fall all around him, blanketing the Earth in magma. He draws in a long, deep breath, bringing in the earthy scent he has always associated with pumpkin pie and apple cider. He is running, and everything seems perfect with the world. It is a beautiful day and the red hot leaves accent the already breathtaking landscape. Invigorated by it all, the man attempts to run faster, but his legs do not respond. It is a strange feeling, he does not understand how his legs can completely ignore the impulses sent from his brain. Not one to give in so easily, the man takes a deep breath, relaxes, and tries once again to increase the pace, but to no avail, his legs are no longer under his control. After several more attempts, he finally gives in, and continues his journey. He has scaled this same hill many times, and anticipates the sapphire blue waters that lie in wait down the other side. For it is a windless, cloudless day and so it will seem as though the sky exists both above and below the horizon. Still resigned to his sluggish pace, the man has nearly made it to the top. He can now see the trees on the opposite side of the bay, pointing towards the sky like flaming fingers. Finally, his feet reach the summit and take in an expected sight. Suddenly, something changes. It is as though every aspect of nature has clicked perfectly into place. It is nearing sunset, and as the man reaches the top of the hill, the sun casts a golden glow over the hills and the bay. Every color is enhanced by the sun’s vibrant rays. The sight stops the man in his tracks. For a moment, he wishes for a camera, but he realizes that no film in the world could capture such a sight in all of its glory. Time pauses as he continues to take in the image before him. As expected, there is not even a hint of a ripple on the cool blue surface of the water. The only other thing that appears there is a ring of fire cast from the trees along the shore, which continue to drop their embers on the ground. Then, just as suddenly as it began, the sun drops out of it’s seemingly magical position. The man pauses, committing the image to his memory, and then continues down the other side of the hill. As he reaches the water’s edge, he tries to speed up. His legs obey. The man smiles as he speeds off down the road, realizing that had he been able to run faster up the hill, he never would have witnessed the sight that seemed as though it was made just for him.

Some exquisite imagery here. You have a wonderful way of painting a scene with words.

I'll admit I was expecting a rather more sinister ending - the words 'magma' and 'fiery' and 'embers' had me imagining he was going to be witnessing an atomic explosion or something as apocalyptic. So it was a pleasant surprise to find the twist at the end was a sweet one.

A couple of points -

It got rather frustrating for the reader to watch him never quite getting to the top of the hill with no apparent reason for the delay. Perhaps this section of the 'plot' could be re-thought out.
Also - the words 'the man' are repeated quite a lot. A little invention called for perhaps.

And finally - splitting this into short paragraphs would be helpful - not for the sake of grammar but to make it easier to read on a pc screen, because it does deserve to be read.

H