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michaelsbearre
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michaelsbearre
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04-25-2012
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07-06-2012
11:51 PM
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Delta40
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hillwalker
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Today,
05:21 AM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Freo Markets
in
Personal Poetry
Good point Hawk. thanks for your suggestions.
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2 replies | 87 view(s)
Yesterday,
07:57 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
On Poetry, Spirituality and Personal Growth
in
Poems, Poets, and Poetry
wow! good read ecurb. I felt miniscule and noble all at the same time!
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3 replies | 184 view(s)
Yesterday,
07:40 PM
Delta40
started a thread
Freo Markets
in
Personal Poetry
The iron gates of the market open and freshly netted fish suck in their fate on iced benches. Lovely whiting. Come and get your whiting. ...
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2 replies | 87 view(s)
Yesterday,
07:04 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Calendar
in
Personal Poetry
I like the second version better although I'm still not comfortable with recrudescent. It is a nice read though and lifts my morning.
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6 replies | 253 view(s)
Yesterday,
06:29 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Narrowby
in
Personal Poetry
Thanks blank. I haven't made any suggested changes to it at this point and in my writing, I only offer the bare minimum before I run out of word...
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7 replies | 279 view(s)
06-17-2013,
05:20 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Narrowby
in
Personal Poetry
Thanks virtuoso and dieter. I think one of the other issues I face is the difference between writing poetry and reciting it. What reads well on...
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7 replies | 279 view(s)
06-17-2013,
05:16 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
De-scent
in
Personal Poetry
Thanks Hawk. I have never been successful with semi colons!
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2 replies | 144 view(s)
06-16-2013,
05:44 PM
Delta40
started a thread
De-scent
in
Personal Poetry
Skinny, hollow promises Scattered about by the wind. Captured for a moment in the wild thorn bush that shakes away the powdery residue of your...
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2 replies | 144 view(s)
06-16-2013,
05:16 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Narrowby
in
Personal Poetry
Funny you mentioned theme Hawk. I haven't been inspired to write much poetry for a while and even after I churned this out, I wasn't pleased. I...
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7 replies | 279 view(s)
06-15-2013,
08:04 PM
Delta40
started a thread
Narrowby
in
Personal Poetry
For you, always I wait in a queue laden with a supermarket smile. When I ask if you have regrets, you blink once before the shutters slide...
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7 replies | 279 view(s)
06-14-2013,
03:50 AM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Poems about cheese
in
Personal Poetry
Like the Beatles original lyrics once rang: cheese cheese me oh yeah like I cheese you...
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11 replies | 364 view(s)
06-14-2013,
12:45 AM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Shell - A new poem
in
Personal Poetry
I love these two lines: Out from underneath my skin. Because the crawling gets to me
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9 replies | 328 view(s)
06-13-2013,
07:17 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
The girl at the bus stop. (Word count: 129)
in
Short Story Sharing
Good monologue for a play
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2 replies | 190 view(s)
06-12-2013,
06:22 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Kindred
in
Short Story Sharing
It is too wordy. Readers don't want a creative write on the mundane so put your energy into the nitty gritty!
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8 replies | 355 view(s)
06-12-2013,
06:15 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Never had any luck with tomatoes
in
Short Story Sharing
I didn't know who was who and you were mixing past and present tense with what seemed like fragmented sentences. Makes it awfully difficult for a...
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4 replies | 182 view(s)
06-12-2013,
03:56 AM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Short Story, Nicholas Brown
in
Short Story Sharing
Excellent analysis of the hours I have spent on here over the last 3 years. Your work here is now complete - I'll leave you to show everyone how it...
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25 replies | 752 view(s)
06-12-2013,
03:52 AM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Kindred
in
Short Story Sharing
I'll pass since my feedback is not worth the screen space it's written on. H
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8 replies | 355 view(s)
06-11-2013,
04:00 PM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Short Story, Nicholas Brown
in
Short Story Sharing
Over to you Nick - I'm done with communicating through your editor. H
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25 replies | 752 view(s)
06-11-2013,
03:51 PM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Short Story, Nicholas Brown
in
Short Story Sharing
It's not good etiquette to critique other members' feedback unless it's in response to your own posting. Even then it can seem overly defensive. ...
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25 replies | 752 view(s)
06-11-2013,
01:00 PM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Three poems to serenade Monday
in
Personal Poetry
Absolutely correct. I don't have an aversion to rhyme. I have written several poems that rhyme - and posted them on here. What I have an aversion to...
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24 replies | 639 view(s)
06-11-2013,
11:33 AM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Abrasive Hawk
in
Personal Poetry
Ok - I give in. Rhyme is sublime. I wish you all the best on those other sites where your skills are better appreciated. I'll not waste my time...
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21 replies | 659 view(s)
06-11-2013,
11:27 AM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Novel excerpt
in
General Writing
I'm not sure I should play along. But, what the hell - I quite enjoyed reading parts of this. It certainly keeps us on our toes. But you still...
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2 replies | 176 view(s)
06-11-2013,
09:37 AM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Three poems to serenade Monday
in
Personal Poetry
Thank goodness this isn't a 'scholarly literature site' in that case. These are unreadable, so your request 'don't read my poems' will at least be...
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24 replies | 639 view(s)
06-11-2013,
03:34 AM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Ant Farm
in
General Writing
http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/spick-and-span.html Whether or not I approve of your writing, the opinion of an independent reader is...
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8 replies | 298 view(s)
06-11-2013,
01:49 AM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Ant Farm
in
General Writing
It is indeed. You're the one on stage. We're just throwing fruit. Please, continue.
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8 replies | 298 view(s)
06-10-2013,
08:33 PM
Delta40
replied to a thread
Ant Farm
in
General Writing
I agree with Hill. there is more than one word for shrieked. Why use the same word twice in one sentence? Plus I could not follow who 'he' was...
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8 replies | 298 view(s)
06-10-2013,
05:45 PM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Ant Farm
in
General Writing
You're a capable writer, and parts of this worked well. You also have a poetic turn of phrase when necessary without over-writing. A couple of...
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8 replies | 298 view(s)
06-10-2013,
05:27 PM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
That Old Drunk
in
Short Story Sharing
I'll not go through the grammar point by point - missing apostrophes (the drunk's back'), spelling mistakes ('too' for 'to' and 'loosing' for...
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3 replies | 186 view(s)
06-10-2013,
05:05 PM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Abrasive Hawk
in
Personal Poetry
That makes it clear as mud. The possibility of it being misread as a question was never an issue. Who's and Whose are two totally different words...
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21 replies | 659 view(s)
06-10-2013,
11:40 AM
hillwalker
replied to a thread
Abrasive Hawk
in
Personal Poetry
Hilarious. The subject of your sentence is the sun's rays - they are blighting the tawny shadow. That's how most people would read it the way it's...
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21 replies | 659 view(s)
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About michaelsbearre
Basic Information
About michaelsbearre
Favorite Author:
Edgar Allan Poe
Favorite Book:
Dante's Inferno
Biography:
Just some dude doing who knows what
Location:
D-pot
Interests:
writing, publishing, critiquing
Occupation:
Published Author
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NEW to this, so thanks for your time!
~Michael S Bearre~
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