IJustMadeThatUp
Talks to the Animals

Good granny . . . I'll say it's longer!

Lets see- where to start? Yes, I was sleeping on the ground, with no tent. I'm just like that. I'll start crashing in my truck bed when the ticks and bugs start getting bad, but no tent. I don't really like tents much. I throw a sleeping pad (all twenty one inches of its width) down, then another blanket on that then my sleeping bag. Then when it rains you have to pick all that **** back up and stash it somewhere so it doesn't get wet. I wouldn't guess sleeping in a truck would be so bad for a short person. One would have to be fairly short though. Yes, fire. Fire is my friend. Kevin and I can sit and stare at a fire for hours without saying a word. Then we'll both jump up at the same time and decide to go to Walmart. Have you ever been to Walmart at two in the morning? That's when all the criminals and petifiles shop. Its fun!

Forty below is something to see! Okay, I lied- nobody goes outside if they don't have to! Obviously the farmers and ranchers have to feed, but everybody else either drinks at home or goes to the bar for days on end. The nice thing about those kinds of temps is that when it gets back up to twenty above, people are out walking around in their t-shirts. Speaking of hot temperatures- today it was 89 (F) and I almost died. I don't understand how people can stay cool in your kinds of weather! Are your body temperatures normal, or do you tend to run higher? I just can't comprehend that.
Yep. You can lose limbs to frostbite if it gets bad enough. I'm lucky enough to have never had it, but from what I hear, it hurts when it starts defrosting! I guess it would be kind of like sticking your hands into a bucket of ice water for an hour.
I mean a hundred forty pounds by a buck forty. I'm a scrawny sucker. I don't have a clue what that translates to in kilos- again, my handy dandy translating phone is across the room and I don't want to get up and get it.

I can imagine someone imagining drinking a fermented beer. I get a kick out of watching people's faces when they take their first shot of hard liquor! Yes, I love my Jack. Uncle Jack is the only friend I have that never judges me! I know that the Jack Daniel's company can only put out so much whiskey, so do you have it all the way down there in Australia? The distillery has been in the same spot for two hundred years and they can't move it, because the water from their well is unique, so they are limited in how much they can produce. (That is my reasoning for my question, if you didn't follow me across that jump.) Oh my. Tequila is at the top of my list of no-no's! I don't know one person that hasn't had a bad experience from that stuff! Though, one of my buddies in high school brought back a bottle of Aha Toro from Mexico, and it was one of the weirdest smelling drinks I've ever smelled. (He didn't share any with me though- the stuff goes for eighty dollars a fifth in the States. )

Since we're on the topic of sand, I once knew a fellow who took a mouthful of sand and chewed on it for a minute so someone would give him a free beer. Can we say desperate?

Ah. So koala's are kind of like little kids? Need to be fed, always want your attention even if they don't know why, grab anything they can get ahold of so they can get a better view of something. I see. Heck, I'm gonna adopt some koalas! They can sleep outside in a tree in the summer and I won't have to clean up after them! That sounds marvelous! Are all koalas picky eaters, or just the spoiled ones? And what do they eat when the shoots aren't in season? People with hard accents annoy the heck out of me- last week some Mexican fellows stopped me and asked me for directions, except they didn't speak any english. At all. It was a lot of hopping up and down and interpretive dance and whatnot. I would have liked to be the people sitting at a stoplight though! (I have a horrible time understanding Japanese accents.) Do your koalas enjoy their good night kisses?

Yep yep. I have a beautiful scar from that incident. I'm very glad I was wearing jeans. Did I already say that? Or was that how we got onto this subject? Whatever. Scars are better than tattoos, I always say! So, do yall just mix and match your measurements down there, or do you have to learn both metric and English? They've been threatening us with the metric system since the 60s, but never went through with it.

wasn't that lovely to leave one person on shift at lunch?? Isn't that when everybody goes to get their tractor and atv parts? How long did you work there?

I'll tell you what- you come visit, and I'll help you smuggle that stupid burro into your suitcase and you can fly her back to Australia! Nobody would notice your carry-on bag moving on a twenty four hour flight, would they? And I bet you're right about your koalas. I don't like kids, and a bunch of spoiled, fuzzy little beasties would drive me up the wall!

Oh dear- I hope this isn't too long!

hiya! look at my thread...

Glad I could make you laugh... I've got a whole stock of ridiculous stories as such, though I'm not sure they're tear worthy.

I don't drive... haha. It scares me, for one, plus it's too expensive. I'd rather bike (and be environmentally friendly while I'm at it xD) My rats lived in my coat during the day (from about 8:00 a.m to six p.m) so they did go for bus rides everywhere. The time they were in their cage was an emergency. We went across a lot of Canada and Ontario, and just around my city. =)

I take no offence to laughing at 'butt rash'... it's hilarious.

Your not too late!

Oh I guess not.

Well hello there!
Are you going to make my afternoon amazing today?

Please dont tell me you got off all the sudden. What the hell????

You best not get off now ya hear???

Maybe...

Have not.