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A strange mood

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I have always wanted to have a blog, so why not here? I donít think I am going to post here my new short stories, only because I am too lazy to translate them on English. Still, there are some days when I have a need to write and then I shall write down my thoughts here. If you donít find it boring to read the thoughts of one teenager, please, read.
So letís start todayÖ
There are so many things I want to say and not to say. For instance I am scared to death by the idea I have to write one letter. It has to be a letter of thanks, but I have no idea what to write down on the e-mail and as a valuable bonus my computerís monitor is watching me incredibly stupid, but what I have expected after all my computer is not of the thoughtful ones. After these sentences I definitely know that I am loosing my time, and the time of the one reading this (if anyone reads it of course), but the hope to write something sensible after all these nonsense is still alive.
The main reason I am writing a blog, searching the net, sitting in front my computer is that I am incredibly bored. I have written already in my profile that I want to meet interesting people. This is my main problem; I donít meet them because of two main reasons: first, there are too few of them and second, I am too much close in my own thoughts to meet anyone. Thatís way I am sitting here and writing post after post: I hope that the dull eyed monitor (as I have said my is staring at me in an unbelievably stupid way) will soften my shyness (this is one of my greatest defects) and help me to get my doze of the interesting peopleís thoughts. But even if I get my doze regularly this is not going to kick of my bad habit of emotional emptiness. You may be thinking this is ridiculous but I feel myself strangely empty, may be because all meaning has fly away from my life. I sometimes wonder if this have happen when all of my strong believe (except this in selfishness and the faith itself) have completely disappeared under the inevitable influence of my circle. Not that people around me shared these believes they just behaved in such way I couldnít made other conclusions of the live itself. I think that may be it is about time to stop whining and get a life, but this doesnít clear of my mind the idea of my own emptiness.