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Barmy Blue's Bland Blog

-part 2 because i don't have a better title-

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So he was trying to get along.


I've been trying to knit a tricky blanket (I didn't do a project last month so I want to get one done this month) so I've been staying up later trying to fix mistakes and such (it really is tricky) so 10am for example. About 10:30 we had a call. That's been happening a lot lately. We keep getting calls from numbers based in India claiming to be from an internet service provider (not mine) about problems. The first time I'm most proud of. She went through her thing and I was just flatly going oh really? with heavy sarcasm. She didn't pick up on it. Then I had a devilish idea and when she gave me a moment to really speak i said something along the lines of "if that's true then you know my name. Right?" She hung up. A genuine company will NOT call you out of the blue and even if they did they would ask specifically for the bill payer before anything else. **** off with your lies.
So yeah. I figures it was probably them again and I ignored it. I had be be up by 4pm at the latest because Yuki has been peeing in the kitchen if we leave her too long. It's not her fault at all and at least she does it in the same place. She peed blood last week, all evening. Mum took a sample to the vet. It was okay. No infection. We think it was because she couldn't hold it anymore, peed in the kitchen (I'd just gotten up to take her out, missed by minutes) so I cleaned up ad took her out anyway for routine and she did a tiny wee that looked bloody. a few hours later for a walk I collected a sample. Bloody. Then a few hours later what looked like a blood clot maybe. She looked normal the next day though. and that went to the vet.
So yeah. I let it be and forgot.
About 4am the next morning mum looked at her phone. 10:30am yesterday missed call. I checked the house phone. About the same time missed call. i checked my phone (I thought I'd checked it that day but texts don't always come in right away so maybe it came in while I was out) same time missed call from my dad.
I stayed up until gone 10am again. Just as I was going up to bed Yuki peed in the kitchen. Mum walks her in the morning. As it was a day off (I think it was the weekend since the vet was Thursday) mum should be up between 9-10:30ish maybe. It varies. Normally Yuki's fine but that day she couldn't wait. She didn't even indicate to me. First I knew of it she'd just gone to the kitchen with purpose and I couldn't do anything about it. I dealt with it and woke up mum to let her know. I'd planned to text my dad but wasn't sure when to do it. Before I went up would've been good but if he didn't answer right away I might be in bed when he called again I debated this with her a bit. And also had to voice a thought before it festered. What if he's dead? What if he died and this it the mythical "Sharon" calling to tell us because he'd called us on three phones one right after the other and it would be quicker to call us from his phone now wouldn't it (We don't answer unknown numbers on our mobile (we can't screen the house phone) because it's usually a scam or marketing or something. I don't know if she knows that) but a familiar number surely guarantees pickup...normally.
I'm paranoid about feeling that I need the toilet, dreaming that I've woken up and gone to the toilet (it seems so real) so I go and end up wetting the bed. I was in my early 20's when that happened and I felt so ashamed to have wet the bed. Since then I've been paranoid about it. I try to make sure my bladder is as empty as possible before going to bed, especially since I also take a sip of water just before bed because my mouth gets dry. So if I can I'll usually sit on the toilet a little while. I was doing this when the phone rang. That could be him calling. Trousers up, no time to wipe (it was only a little pee if that makes it any better and my hands were clean) rush downstairs and get the phone.
Well he's not dead yet. Instant relief. I'm tired and having trouble hearing him because there's talking and a REALLY annoying beeping. Basically he's in hospital again. Someone is asking for his breakfast order. Cornflakes with cold milk if possible. Toast. Orange juice. No hot drinks, that's what the juice is for. Digestive biscuits if you have any. or gingernuts or something. The beeping is a machine he's hooked up to. The bottle needs replacing. A nurse is hurrying over with it.

He blocked again and couldn't flush it. "Sharon" was at work (she'd had to switch shifts to take him to the kidney thing, he felt guilty about that). He had to go in by ambulance.

He's called one or two times since and I've had a text to in no particular order.

He's due an injection at the gp. His pills have stopped working but he has to keep taking them for now (both are the hormone treatment) next step will be radiotherapy (I'm pretty sure that's radiation but don't mention it. Look it up later. Yep. Radiation). We need to meet up some time (when he'd first brought this up Burger King was the suggestion. I'm not a fan of the place personally, I'm a MacDonald's girl but I haven't even had that for years. I'm seeing how long I can go without it though it's vague because I can't remember when I stopped so it's more a principal thing) but clearly not right now and he can't travel far which id why he suggests somewhere outside.
He recognized the doctor from not the last time but the time before when he was in hospital and another doctor remembered him from last time he was in because he had blue hands (apparently he'd been using a professional type of wood glue without gloves before going in and it stains your hands. He spent aged trying and failing to wash it off). The nurse told him his tube's blocked again. He says it's my fault (as a joke) and the nurse will come round and beat me up. Oh no. Please don't kill me said with melodrama. The very least I can do is maybe try to entertain him a tiny bit maybe.
I'd looked it up before and found it wouldn't work because he doesn't have an apple ID but I've been told it could work with a phone number so maybe we actually could talk over Facetime. No. His phone is Android and I doubt either of us will have the technical savvy to work it even if it did.
He's going for a CT scan with contrast tomorrow but I don't know when he sent that text.

And I think that's it. You see why I put it off. There was probably other stuff too.

The dog escaped a few months ago now. I was moving my plants from the front an the back and left the door open. She showed no interest and even though it was open I put it too but it was a bit windy. I came back and no dog. Heart stopping moment but don't panic. Check the living room. Nothing. She MUST be here. Don't waste time. RUN. Didn't have time to gram a lead and it's a good thing I didn't. Rush out. Which way? right nothing. Left I see her bum just vanish round the corner. RUN. Before she gets to the road or someone grabs her and steals her. The ***** is just happily trotting down the street and coming to the road. I grab the fur on her back harder than I normally would (it's usually just to say I'm here don't move) to stop her so I can grab her collar and pull her home awkwardly bending down because I am NOT risking losing my grip on her. I was so frightened. And just ONE second and she could've been lost. ****ing *****. She didn't even care. She was just having a jolly time. It took a while to forgive her for that, though it was actually myself. I'd gotten too complacent trusting her to be good. It took a while to get over.

Yeah. That's it.